I have stolen but a moments glance of your smiling face;
But what an impression you have left,
I have made no touch upon your beautiful form;
But your words hold great kindness;
And sway over my thoughts where no other has walked,
I fear you believe I am little to nothing,
But I promise I want to give you all I can afford;
With this broken, dying soul of mine,
I want to be with you forever in a day;
My white witch; my sourceress,
Allow me to be; and I shall never leave you any doubt in your heart;
Or your soul again.
Author notes
This is just a small poem I wrote from the depths of my heart and soul.
A contest entry
- Dirty Pretty Contest by Innocent Evil.
700 points, ended January 5, 2008, 35 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 17 of 17
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hmmm
its good, but i dont fully understand it. but i suppose you are the only one who will every trully understand it, great write hunni, love u xx
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well done here this was fullof great emotion.
i love a poem that hits the heart.
well done
best wishes to you in 2008
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I feel this aswell has a little over-used on personal nouns. It just spoils the emotions and really drains through. I feel some small editing would make this so much more.
Thanks for entering
& you are being removed but feel free to enter again.
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This is absolutley Amazing. The wording is very, Shakespeare yet the feel was very modern. Kudos, truly.
Perhaps, extend it? Yet then again. Short and Sweet is always wonderful <3
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Loved it
i love the part 'With this broken, dying soul of mine' -
I have stolen but a moments glance of your smiling face;
But what an impression you have left,
I have made no touch upon your beautiful form;
I love how you worded these lines, especially with "stolen but a moments glance of your smiling face."
With this broken, dying soul of mine,
I want to be with you forever in a day;
My white witch; my sourceress,
Allow me to be; and I shall never leave you any doubt in your heart;
Or your soul again.
I love the word choices to describe the one you love. Very well done!!
Knight70
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This is stunning!!
i love it!
Really deep and certainly thoughtful.
<3
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Small but beautiful, Alex. Who is she? I must know! lol
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My gosh alex
how come i have never came across this one before?!
this is awwwesome!
like whoa!
xx
ily alex
♥*♥*
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Wow, how beautiful! The first two lines were by far my favorites, but the whole thing is absolutely...(insert better word than "beautiful" here)! I love it! Keep up the good writing!
~Avan~
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Wowies...well done Lexi...I see you're in lurrrve
Great write hun!
Xoxo
Love
Alone -
hmm....I like it! Maybe I've finally found another one...I hope I have! Great poem....^^
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Beautiful.
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Alex this is well written and sweet good write
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Wow Alex this is such a sweet poem i really LOVE it
Some lines that got me were:
I have stolen but a moments glance of your smiling face;
But what an impression you have left,
I have made no touch upon your beautiful form;
But your words hold great kindness;
And sway over my thoughts where no other has walked,
They really touched me but so did the whole poem
(i'd give you more applauds if it were allowed)
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awwwwwwww this is so deep alex. I like it, very well penned
Peace and Love
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very cute darling
i like it
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