What’s this fire in my veins that’s driving me insane?
‘Pillow for my sadness’, gone where, for what, why so?
How did my prostrate prayers get me this mark of Cain?
Where is that sunlit stream with my young prancing doe?
Oh, these young puzzles for one who splits rocks by hand!
Shining in glory, slay your dragons and demons.
Single minded heart, traversing all wanton land
follow that bright star who guides you through your seasons!
Warrior of light with the cosmos on your side,
go … drink life, run free, fight, sing, dance, think, rest and love!
In the pulse of creation is where you reside.
Your divine journey is a gift from God above.
Farewell my rock man; I bless any path you choose.
Tenderly nurture that wild heart inside your soul.
Remember our Law in the battles you will lose.
Love all your defeats as they help to make you whole.
Your own destiny is a voice that cries within.
Embrace her like life as she leads you to the end.
Victories taste good, but they come with much chagrin.
“Cherish the journey,” prays your father … a true friend.
Author notes
1) Written the morning I send my number 2 son off to the US.
2) Rock is the meaning of the Greek name Peter.
3) Man is the meaning of the Greek name John.
A contest entry
- leaving home by Erroneous Method.
800 points, ended August 12, 2008, 9 entries
Gold trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 21 of 21
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um
ok commenting on this is going to be difficult um I should let you know that this is one of the best poems I have ever read in my life its border line biblical. I love how deep this is on so many levels I sound dumb write now but I’m speechless good work comment again later -
Such a meaningful dedication...
So strong and so deep. This poem has a lot of heartfelt meaning, and is bittersweet. It conveys the sorrow of letting someone you love go, but also the pride you have in them, everything they've done, and everything they will do. Amazing!
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Inpressive!!!
You really have allot of knowledge printed into this poem, I hope that "Peter" took this and keep this in mind!!!
My favorite part is " Love all your defeats, as they help to make you whole" since I am struggling with that.
Good luck to you who awaits him, and to him so he return home safely!!
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may your son find his way, may it be a way that forever will make a father proud and therewith soften the heart ache of letting go. By looking at the date when this was written [recently], I imagine you still missing him with that pain in your heart.I wish you gentle healing,
reenie
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so bittersweet
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I applaud you on this fine effort. Both as a companion father and a fellow poet.
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very good
awwh that was sosad. i love your style of writing everything flows beautifully. i love the way it rhymes so easily. welldone brilliant write x
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very good
alas, a goodbye
bery painful
but
one of joy, also
as we all must embark someday
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sending one away
brings pain no matter where they go, you penned this very strongly and have so much energy to post it with,thanks for sharing gl....SH
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This is great.
This is very interesting and insightful. Emotionally this is avery great way to say farewell to one of your children. What a nice way to send them off to live their lives without you as a center. This is not awkward to read and I personally wouldn't change any of it. The last verse is my favorite. The title say just what must be said. the first line seems a little harsh, but the last line is just what should be said. Overall it is a good poem.
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Aw thats sad. But A very great poem.
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Sobering
There was a kind of wildness in this poem contained by duty and honor. Pride was a huge factor as well...It made me think... -
We only have them for a short time, not a long time, but hope we have instilled in them a sense of right and wrong and a way to make their own way in the world. Very heartfelt, and well wishing write for your #2 son. Easy to read and understand these sentiments you express so well in these lines.
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A heart-felt write written with sincerity which was felt,the rock man,the man-child that grounds us to this earth and the stars that he wishes to traverse,yes a true friend is the father that says live,love,laugh but learn all the lessons that life brings and go with my blessing and come back when you have spread your wings.
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A sombre piece of the most beautiful heartbreaking writing. It is almost too much to make comment. The loss will always be there but memory holds the door. Thank you so much for sharing,
Donald -
I can tell you are very passionate about this. Your writting here reminds me a bit of emerson. I don;t think your words are so revolutionary, but the way you are saying them and with such passion, really makes this poem mean something.
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Uniquely profound.
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This breaks my heart for you , I understand but gotta give them their own wings and hope they do whats right and make a great life !
My heart goes out ...
~Lisa~
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wonderfully heartfelt
this poem was very heart felt i may not know how u feel about your son moving on but i do know that once he finds his path than you will be very proud of him as i know u r right now for going to find his destiny.
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What a heartfelt piece. I can feel your pain and yet you are happy that he is finding his own way. It is so hard to let them go. Great job.
Soulful Woman
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Thanks for your comment ...
My son and I have been working toghether in the Sunni Triangle for 18 months. We've had a lot of adventures together and grown quite close. So, it's an emotional morning for me. In about an hour, we'll fly to Baghdad together and then he's heading to the US to find his own 'way'. Thanks for connecting with me over this. Love, Sultan.
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