Stitched lacerations,
darkened around edges.
Ultraviolet piercing my pain,
like blades slicing warm air.
Surrounded by living things...
Help me
Author notes
Prompt: What would you see if you held yourself up to the light?"
A contest entry
- Quickie...10x20x30 by poetsruletheworld.
600 points, ended August 12, 2007, 8 entries
Gold trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Anything by Madison Mary.
1000 points, ended September 18, 2007, 25 entries
Gold trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Longing to read BREVITY by Lavender Butterfly.
390 points, ended March 18, 2008, 8 entries
Honorable mention
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - The Silent Ones by Ephiphany.
600 points, ended March 28, 2008, 11 entries
Honorable mention
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 25 of 25
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Short but sweet loved it
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As short as this is, you did capture a very helpless feeling here. Great work on that! Great imagery, too. I would have loved to see something longer, but I did enjoy this. Thank you for entering my contest.
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This is a very intense and interesting piece and I like it, for it's shortness and simplicity yet it does shed an inner meaning.
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Oh my!
how deep and vivid is this?
Love the take.
Thank you and good luck.
e
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This is quite compelling and deeply engaging... x
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Dang, this was freaky...it gave me chills...well done here and I wish you the best of luck in the contest
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It's very sad...
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Very nice... great diction... I loved it. I love the dark emo poems... I just hate the cutting. Thank you for entering my contest.
Lumin -
Oh my...is this what you see? I don't want you to see that...
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Oh my Jason, this is the saddest ever. There are emotions here that pierce the heart, and hold themselves down in weighty heaviness. A very frightful poem. If this is how you are feeling of late, please know that there are those who care.
Congrats on your two gold's for this one. It is surely merit worthy.
Much Love ♥
Renee
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Wow...short, yet it says so much in so few lines. Truly beautiful, although tragic. Thank you for the entry.
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I think this is what I would see alos, if I held myself up to the light, am much happier here in the darkness... wonderfully lonely and sad this piece is.... well done on a great write in so few words
Thank you for taking the time to enter your favourite prewrite in this contest, I wish you the very best of luck
Karen -
this is very desolate and meaningful, thanks for entry
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wow superbly deep major thought provoking thoughts - a emotionally sad write at that well done indeed and well done on the gold
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hm wow, Skype's nephew, lol. That's what came to mind when looking at this. This picture has a lot of symbolism I think you could play on. Ithink you just started to capture it, and given for example the 'poem' you entered in my worst write contest, you could be a master story teller around this picture. By the way the story you entered in my contest- did you really consider that poetry, or prose? Just curious.
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wow. that last line combined with the stare from the eyes in the picture is enough to make me cry. There was so much hurting shining through from that innocent glare. I can't believe how well you matched that up.
Also, the way you went from the prompt to those lines - wow. I would see the exact same thing, and I'm going to bookmark this. You really deserved your gold on this!
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oh no! I hope these are not real feelings poem epressed them so wonderfully very well done on the gold congrats
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Congratulation On the Gold
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Wow sad take on the prompt; I can relate to your write, powerful good luck.
LISA
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wow! someone turn of the light quick.
very well done. ///if a little graphically scary
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Very well written, great imagery involved here if a little graphic to me. but well done nontheless. best of luck...Scott
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your a very good poet this is exactly how I feel I can relate to this so much.
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Wow...this one blew me away...nice take on the prompt, thanks so much for entering
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*holds out a hand to be a friend* I am always here to help.
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prompt up..
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