We exploded onto the blank pages,
leaving a bruised paper trail.
Those fingerpaints we used to color in our devotion
scorched the pages
(but the hearts we drew on each other's chests
stayed perfect).
Overturning bloody red's reign as
Valentine King,
we signed our names in cyan instead
(they whispered we were
too bright, too bold)
when we exploded into black oblivion;
but I felt like an artist again
(we molded feathers and wax into secrets,
but Love will never be Icharus).
They told us passion could only ever be
maroon
but we were rushing over azure rapids,
(on that flimsy life boat).
We took a leap off that waterfall
(you promised we wouldn't hit the bottom
and we didn't).
Author notes
Prompt: Cyan
dude... for all those who get here from gmail... see the prompt...
A contest entry
- Colors! by autarky.
700 points, ended August 25, 2007, 8 entries
Bronze trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
-
Beautiful write. Amazing flow and rhythm, your words drew me right into the piece and I was feeling the rush and excitement. You made me believe that passion and romance can be cyan. I love the way you used praenthesis to further explain and bring more depth of feeling to the piece, such beautiful lines they could almost be a poem by themselves! An excellent write, thank you for sharing this with us and good luck in the contest!
~Laura
-
Haha...our writing styles are very similar. And there's a good explanation for that, too...
Anyway, this was brilliant. Another DP poem! ^^
The conflict between the colors is spectacular. And there are so many simply amazing lines in this one that I can't choose a favorite.
"Those fingerpaints we used to color in our devotion
scorched the pages
(but the hearts we drew on each other's chests
stayed perfect)."
(Sigh) So romantic...
Oh, and I loved the ending; it was freaking magnificent!
Good job, and good luck!
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