Too much noise swallowing me in
too many thoughts that don't fit in my head
I want you to fly me away
from everything and everyone
so all I can see is the empty horizon
so all I can feel is your soft breeze in my hair
so all I can taste is the salted sea water
and so all I can hear is you
Submerge me under the sea
for I feel freedom in the darkness
hide me as deep as you can
where I'll feel safe and alone, forever
Comments
1 - 6 of 6
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You have captured so much feeling and emotion in this piece. Simply stated, this was very well written.
Good luck in the contest.
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Big Sis! One, thanks for your encouraging comments, and 2, this is a really good poem!! I don't know how to explain it, but your way of writing this is so calm, and peaceful, that it feels like you ARE under the sea! You describe it very well! your 'lil sista', Emily
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I dont really see it fitting with the picture though
ehh thanks fro entering -
wooooow this is beautiful, so very soft and understated. this carried me away a bit... keep up the writing!
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Oh my! This is absolutely beautiful, your wonderful flow took me directly to your image and we went soaring through the sea and air away from all our cares and troubles. Thank you for the vacation. You are a wonderful writer and you have the heart of a poet.
Love,
Amera ♥
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Maria,
Wowwwwwwww my dear niece, this is very deep and it flowed effortlessly. I don't see you as wanting to be alone forever as you are more outgoing to me. I love the references of the soft breeze and salted sea water. They create such lovely images in my mind's eye. This entire piece was filled with some vivid imagery. Remember to stay in the light, it is a better place. I don't want you lost in darkness forever. Keep that ink flowing. Love always, Auntie Joyce xoxoxoxoxo 
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