Is it human to feel sub-human?
A self-obssessed, self-loathing Christian?
But isn't it evil when you lose your religion?
Realize you've wasted your life on silly superstition.
It won't save you and it won't cure you,
It can't hold you and it can't touch you.
And I know its frustrating, but you know I'm right.
Don't take it out on me, I'm only performing the human plight.
All we can know is nothing, so all we can be is nothing.
Mimetic whores surviving on hatred and oh its thrilling.
And I'm sorry if I sound bitter, but its hard
To perform this life and I'm not bitter, but scared.
Author notes
I'm aware that this flows terribly, what with the unbalanced length of the lines and the dreadful forced rhyme, but it is quite an embarrassingly honest piece and I haven't written one in quite some time so please don't rip it apart too quickly.
Please tell me what you think
Comments
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maybe it's a personal struggle that every person has to face to rid themselves of the either/or lifestyle... either fun and friendship and popularity or religious conformity that everyone tries so hard to buy into daily. well. i'm glad to be rid of it.
i don't think we realized for all those years what individual sacrifice or compassion really looked like for our own lives. and now we do.
only do what you can do. and repossess your teachable child-like spirit. the one that was stubborn and explosive in its creativity.
i still find that applying scripture to my life has ultimate benifit as a complete lifestyle change because of its intuitive discernment. i learn what it is about love that is so attractive. making people feel comfortable being themselves. being objective in conversations. BEING RELATABLE (knowing your weaknesses and loving yourself despite them, in other words, your open willingness to share them with others), very key. applying your knowledge of scripture to the situation.
problem: no one is looking at scripture as applicable to his or her own individuality. and no one gives a shit about empathy and compassion or getting their hands filthy.
it becomes a 'feeling' or a 'philosophy.' christ is removed from his self-proclaimed footstool as servant-papa to his children and jealous lover of the soul to "oh. i desire that kind of love for my own benifit, but i don't want to expose myself to scrutiny and sacrifice for the sake of being sculpted into a quality patchwork piece of art"
it's not even that difficult to understand.
obey it. apply it. test it where you think it's weak. it will hold true to the scientific method.
to add to that, it's a process that's always in process. that's the beauty of ignorance. you're always having these epiphanies like, "damn, why did i think my way would work again?" and ultimately you'll realize you were sneaking around trying to get the full spectrum of half-truth, half-rebellion and coming up with nothing progressive.
if you don't want to obey it. then that's a choice you have to make for yourself. it's that simple.
your honesty makes me respect you more by the way. as well as respecting your decisions. i will never take anything out on you for that.
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