I fell asleep with your lovely name on my lonely lips. A sweet soft whispering into my folded fingertips. I could dream nothing better than this- holding you somewhere deep within the darkness.
All we were was a lie, where we stifled and strangled all of our batting butterflies. We were a flirting fanciful infatuation, dancing in our own immaculate imaginations. We were an ideal too good to be real, something we just never let ourselves feel. Still bathing in your beautiful brown eyes, recalling all of the secret ties- all of the time. I still remember everything; every resounding resemblance of all you've ever said to me.
I remember where we met, in breif blooming summer innocence, surrounded by a young audience we came to pretend to befriend. Our late lessons, over, but the melody of the strumming chords still linger and the imprints of strings still fresh upon our fleshy fingers. Sheltered togather, surrounded by shower pouring from storm clouds which devour a grey sky. It was several misty musty mornings before i knew your name but only several seconds before i knew of your isolated fame. And every year we kept coming just the same to the polaroid pictures we just forgot to frame. Walking on trails through trees where whimsical woodlen creatures sleep; we came to watch your tribal dance- caught in such a memerizing tricky trance.
Summer faded and all welcoming warmth evaded- i came to know you then for all you are and all you've been. Coming early to auditions for our ample positions in this disasterous play we've been given. In our costumes we've created and paraded to perfection, but still, our contemplated characters are a misconception. It's all a stage to us. The act and the lie the only things we can trust. But behind curtains tied there is something there we did hide- behind closed doors there's so much more.
Like our crowded room conversations, spilling over old philosophies and obligations as we sat on old molded furniature forgotten in a forbidden room; like a ceaseless silence sealed within an ancient burial tomb. So intently are our eyes connected in glimpses of understanding- the gaze- malignant and demanding. No, i couldn't turn away. So enthralled, so enchanted by everything you'd presented. It's the giggling whispers of two girls gossiping in the night and she's sorrowfully stammering- 'He likes you alright? ! '
It's the same blushing walk we're taking someday and you're handing me that small white flower boquet. We're warming by the window sill sleeping and i'm wondering what dream you're dreaming and i can't help but want to be so close even though the faithful answer is 'no.'
We're in the empty old house of our past where we made our ambiguous attraction last. We've been here before behind closed doors, creaking down half-lit hallways and gracefully descending down the old wooden staircase. It's the smell of ripe autumn apples warm and wafting on the breeze as we go to take our leave. sneaking away, breaking away into the bleak blurry day, the fury of the feirce wind blowing my breath away (but you already took mine- don't your realize?)
I can still hear the laughter and my heartbeat pounding faster in this jumping jack game we're after on the expanse of cold wet black. Called after play to display our humble art on plates, wrapped sloppily with colored cellophane. Stalking down shadows and seeking out patterns standing out in the rain.
You're standing only mere inches away and i'm trying to find all of the words to say but you wouldn't understand anyway... so nevermind. I couldn't have possibly said all it was that went through my head- but i tried. The letters all wrote themselves, i never lied about what i felt. I admit maybe i felt too much- but there is a difference between feel and touch.
Where are you in all of this? You left me in such a long awkward silence, no answers to confused violence. I just wanted closure- to tell you so you could tell me 'it's over.' But it's all the same cuz it never came.
I caught a glimpse of your grinning face; the burning brown eyes i still can't erase but it's okay. I don't want to. I want to remember this- i want to remember you. Staring at pictures posted on pixelated pages i'm still staring at after all of these ages. I didn't notice, i didn't know this: your effect on me. But remember every time you breathe- everytime you bleed- smile knowing you were my fantasy.
A contest entry
- One More Day by WhisperingSpirit.
600 points, ended August 12, 2007, 8 entries
Gold trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - ~All Types (Please Try)~ by XxXAmazed MeXxX.
475 points, ended August 21, 2007, 6 entries
Honorable mention
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - TONS OF OPTIONS!!! Please enter and give it a try, I want a lot more entries! by perfectsunset.
450 points, ended September 7, 2007, 63 entries
Honorable mention
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Hold me, and tell me we'll burn like stars...(options!) by LearningHow2Smile.
700 points, ended September 10, 2007, 13 entries
Silver trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - What is Love? by Cyprien.
550 points, ended September 7, 2007, 7 entries
Silver trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - ♥[Tear] Covered Smiles && Ink Staind [Heartache]♥ by CatastrophicSmile.
400 points, ended October 21, 2007, 10 entries
Gold trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
♥
Comments
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THIS TOOK MY BREATH AWAY
Sorry, I am so breath taken... and I am even crying. God, this is the best write I have ever best related to in my life... this is so amazing. This is so beautiful, I love your flow and not one line, one line was a line I didn't admire. You have no idea how much this write affected me. Really... I would be honored if you entered this in my conest. I really truly would. It is the only contest I am holding right now and I would really really love if you entered this... (wipes away tear) Amazing...





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wow this was truly an amazing read...i think it fits in with both options and yes love is a battlefeild...it was kind of long but i like to actually read long poems...thank you for entering and good luck in the contest!!
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wow, just wow. very well written. full of such love and wonderful imagery. i can see why it wears all of those trophies. best of luck in the contest. be well and be blessed
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Sheer beauty
... I honestly don't know where to start..
I usually say "you'ved rendered me speechless" in these type of situations... but then I end up writing a bloody novel, XD. So I will just 'wing it'.
First off, I love the rhythm. It wasn't redundant, and again, I give you my utmost gratitude for that, being that most of the rhyming poetry I read (which isn't a lot..) is just... atrocious, except for a special few. You kept it fresh and unique, dripping with emotion... The entire piece resonated with your heart, and the anguish that resides there...
Realizing that everything was a lie in a relationship is... I don't think there is just one word to describe the maelstrom of agony, and hatred... To trust someone enough to give them everything you have, most importantly your heart... and then they put it through a wood chipper. You never would have guessed the thoughts dancing behind those beautiful brown eyes... And who could blame you? Love makes us blind and very accessible for heartache.
I'm going to cut this a bit short because I can't keep my eyes open, lol. All in all... perfection. Beautiful sorrow. I hope your heart heals. Thank you for sharing and congratz on the Silver,
. Goodnight. OR... morning,
lol. Ta.
~S

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wow. GREAT. Amazing, I love this piece. Thanks for entering it into my contest. and good luck.
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I loved this piece. It does skim the surface of how I feel right now. Very, very close. Thank you for a wonderful piece and good luck in the contest!


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this is a beautiful write. It was fairly long but I liked how you rhymed it. It gave it a good vibe and I enjoyed reading it. Loved reading your incredibly long, beautiful nice flowing poem. good luck in the contests you have entered in!

Sleep-N
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it was good, it was long, but it could been shortened. the whole imagination and all that was good, but it was just a little too long. i personally thought you coulda put it in an actual poem format. and how you take your poem and enter it in more than one contest, i don't really like that, cuz it's not more from your heart. anywayz, good luck
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I like the weaving in between memories and the vivid descriptions, but I felt like the alliterations were a bit forced every now and then. Obviously it was a trait you kept up through the whole poem, so I'm not saying take those out, by any means.
It was very calming and gave this kind of sepia-grained picture in my mind. -
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I love alliteration- the way words can sound when juxtaposed against another. But i have to admit it is a bit abused in my poetry- like an addiction. It helps me to write. A lot of people write in rhymes and let previous words inspire the next by the way they sound. I let the letters lead me instead of rhymes b/c it only comes natural. It's not for everyone and i have to say it is sometimes a little forced or fixed but most of the time i am pleased w/ what's produced b/c i know what i'm trying to say, even if others don't. I suppose i should work on that.
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This is a very beautiful work, thank you for this entry, I'm dumbfounded by it.
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Aw.
cutee [=
Thank you for the entry!
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Even though this was such a long poem, I couldn't stop reading to find out what happened next. You graced your words so beautifully and I really liked reading this. It was a wonderful piece you should be proud of writing, perfect for option 14. Best of luck, and thank you for entering my contest
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Wow
I love it. The detail and the thought is just so perfect! -
wow! I have to say, when i saw the length i almost wished i'd enforced a limit on the number of lines allowed but upon reading this piece, i have to say, WOW! This was simply beautiful!! it just flowed so wonderfully and the rhyme was great! The opening was lovely, perhaps thats my favouite part, it is difficult to decide! Thank you for this entry! I loved it!
Take care, Sam (Dreams27) xxxx -
Thia is amazing.
Truley a love that the heart holds deep.
I love the flow of this the way you brought me through the hallways, the gigging girls, behind the closed doors. I loved the words you used. And this was just beautiful. Thank You for entering.
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