Who are you to judge me?
I've seen through many eyes
When death comes riding through here
With lightning reflex surprise
For in your eyes there is a legend
Where a tattoo marks your soul
Like a river of molten fury
That is out of your control.
Because the gates of hell are open
And in the shadows beckoning
Is the way to sure-fire damnation
Time has come for a reckoning
Let my snake eyes put you under
Let me saturate your mind
To the madness and the thunder
Hell is waiting for your kind.
So let the dance begin in earnest
Take a step into the dark
Where the ice and madness linger
And your soul is torn apart
Can you feel your skin soon blister
And that itching in your palm
Is the start of something bigger
That will melt your fiery heart.
Step off into the waiting darkness
Where the lightning flashes high
Across this blasted landscape
There is no escape for you and I
Let your self become the undoing
Of every thought you ever lost
For when you ride the lightning
You end up nailed to this fiery cross...
Author notes
Heavy Metal lyrics with a slow driving beat
A contest entry
- My Misunderstood Music: Metal by free-samples.
1000 points, ended September 3, 2007, 6 entries
Silver trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - A Quickie Contest...... Rhymning (720 points) 48 Hours Extending it a bit longer! by Heavens Child.
600 points, ended August 24, 2007, 47 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Just Me...And You... by FlipperSwitch.
600 points, ended September 8, 2007, 18 entries
Gold trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Lookin' for Lyrics by L.e.l..
410 points, ended September 14, 2007, 28 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - The Unholy by ILikeChocolateMilk.
600 points, ended September 28, 2007, 12 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - I WANT LYRICS by RebelJester.
340 points, ended October 7, 2007, 39 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - By Demons Be Driven by Acidanthra.
525 points, ended November 20, 2007, 13 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Hells Rhymes by piccola.
450 points, ended December 15, 2007, 9 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Dark Matter please. by My Selfish Romance.
380 points, ended May 15, 2008, 16 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Heavy Metal by Grave-Digger.
500 points, ended July 16, 2008, 10 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Music To My Ears by Brandan Shamaya.
600 points, ended July 22, 2008, 17 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Raven Song by Shya.
700 points, ended October 19, 2008, 22 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Deep, Dark and Lovely by Shantti.
400 points, ended October 6, 45 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 10 of 10
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I've always been a sucker for some good heavy metal
You did awesome with this.
Thank you for entering my contest

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i'm digging it, thanks for entering


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I see why this captured gold. Great rhyme and visuals. Congrats on the trophy and thanks for entering
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Thank you for entering this in my cotest. I'm finally judging (thank you for your patience thus far) and will have results by tomorrow morning.
-Blue -
it had a good flow and it had good use of rhyme but it was really fast paced there were no pauses you had a period for each section but that was it it flew by before i had time to apreaciate it
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I like it a lot! It's great! This is my favorite part:
Because the gates of hell are open
And in the shadows beckoning
Is the way to sure-fire damnation
Time has come for a reckoning
I don't think rhyme is necessary for this piece though and gets in the way a little. Overall, great work!

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Excellent! I feel like I'm damned....scary but probably true anyways so excellent! Thanks for the entry!
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A very unique write. 'Because the gates of hell are open and in the shadows beckoning Is the way to sure- fire damnation time has come for a reckoning', brilliantly worded. Love it. Thank you for the entry in my contest.
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Intriguing,I enjoyed the rhyme scheme and the flow of it all.
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WOW!!!!!
That is perfect, you had three people standing up and cheering at the end. Well done and best of luck in the contest.

1 - 10 of 10









