Childhood sweetheart,
They are never apart.
He held her with such an embrace,
her brown eyes twinkle with such grace.
All day long outside they play tag,
In the yard watch them do little zig-zags.
As they get older and there love grows,
Forever they do know.
Memories only best friends can share,
Turned into love as we both became aware.
twenty-five years move on,
Down the ilse plays their song.
A contest entry
- Awe so cute.. Come take a look. by delightfulmess.
550 points, ended August 11, 2007, 8 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 14 of 14
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Hey, Amber,
I like this. It's really cute. I'm never had a childhood sweetheart. I did a few mistakes and was confused on the 3rd line. Sweetheart is all one word. then... 'He hold her witch such embrace,'? Maybe... 'He held her with such an embrace,' would sound better? Not sure if that is what you meant though.
Anyway, nicely written. Keep the ink flowing.
~Donna~
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They thanks for the comment and the help I went back and fixed it.
Amber
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Awww this is a sweet write.A childhood friend that grows into a life long frind is the greatest gift anyone sould ask for thanks for sharing.
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Once again thanks for reading feel free to read more. I'm glad you enjoyed it.
Amber
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This brings back delicious memories for me...first loves can be overwhelming, thanks for focusing on them
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2lullabyhaven
Once again thank you so much for reading I'm glad you liked it. Feel free to read more.
Amber
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Wow this is such a sweet poem Very well done chica! It's so simple, full of happiness and love. Very very very good. I wish you the best of luck in the contest.
Keep writing and God Bless
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Thank you for reading I'm glad you liked it.
Amber
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Nicely written,
CAn't you juust see it in their eyes.
Buddy
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Thanks for reading please feel free to read more.
Amber
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Oh this is precious so simple yet gave me goosebumps
I am a sucker for those thank you so much for entering
You have done my pic its justice thank you
Delila
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Thank you so much for reading and letting me join your contest. Please feel free to read more.
Amber
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Childhood sweethearts make heart plural
He holds her with such an embrace
Down the Ilse plays their songMemories only best friends can share
Turned into love as we both became aware
A very catching poem here and it brought back memories of my first sweetheart
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thanks for reading. what there something I should take out or add?
Amber
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