damn...i'm not sure what to put down
thoughts in my head just swirling around
i never thought i could feel this way
thinkin about someone every single day...
and that person is you..
i love everything you do
the way you hold me in your arms
makes me feel safe frum any kind of harm
i love it when we kiss, lips so soft and sweet,
love when i lay my head on ur chest and listen to ur heartbeat
love the way u make me feel so complete
it cant get any better, baby you are the elite
i love all the time that we spend
i love how perfect we blend
i'm so happy GOD put you in my life
and i cant wait for the day i become your wife
i wake up every morning happy because we're in love
before i got to sleep you're the first and last person i think of
love the feeling i get when you look into my eyes
and i can tell when i look in your's that your not telling me lies
my love for you cant be verbally expressed
but trust when i say i feel so blessed
that i can love u with all my heart and soul
and my feelings for you are more than i can control
because i'm so into you i could never turn back
and we kinda make up for what one of us might lack
no one could ever make me feel the way you do
baby i just wanna say i love you
A contest entry
- BLOW MY MIND UP by Swan song.
1000 points, ended August 26, 2007, 20 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - I luv love by God is my reality.
300 points, ended August 27, 2007, 5 entries
Silver trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Teenage Love Poems (May Be Prewrites) by ChrissyJean.
330 points, ended October 8, 2007, 49 entries
Gold trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Love & Life by BAMFNx3.
825 points, ended December 16, 2007, 13 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Round One of Five by Kei-Aira.
450 points, ended February 5, 2008, 27 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 21 of 21
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This is great. This is real, straight from the heart. You can tell in every line that you're in love, it's expressed wonderfully. My only problem with this is the flow in some areas. It kind of falters a bit, which I think kind of takes away some of the flare. Just taking away a word that isn't really needed in certain places would help it out. Giving it a basic, and consistent rhythm. But that's my opinion. Either way, great job.
-Josh
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Mighty and powerful is your pen. This was a well written piece with great emotion. Thank you for sharing it and best wishes. Keep that pen handy dear poet.
♥ Touchof1der -
Wow... Really a beautiful write
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Very beautiful. I can deffinately relate.
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Wow. Love. Such a wonderful feeling. What's it mean to really be in love? Well, I think you expressed it greatly here in this poem. It was awesome
Very well written from the heart. This was beauty at its finest Great Job my friend
God Bless YOu!!
Charles
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and anotha one
dis could be a song and i bet it win grammys
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so i never commented on this one! >=]
hmm, it's great!!
You deserved the gold =]
I'm proud of you, yayyyy!
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AMAZING!
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thank u
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because i'm so into you i could never turn back
and we kinda make up for what one of us might lack
no one could ever make me feel the way you do
baby i just wanna say i love you
words I love you
are hard and easy
at the same time -
This is sooo good. I love it. It is beautiful. It is just wow. It is what I'm looking for. I love the raw emotion in this poem. I can totally relate to everything in this poem. It is really truly outstanding. Excellent job, and with a poem like this, you don't need luck
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This has nice rhyme and good flow. It is positive and I like reading positive poems.
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I absulutely Loved this Piece........
so much emotion in your words.......
I love these type of poems!!!!!!!
how you make me feel as if i was actually there
in that moment........
Not many people can capture feelings
as well as you have in the poem.......
How every line flows nicely into the next......
great write!!!!!!!!!!!!
I cant wait to read more of your poems!!!!!!
A++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
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OMFG!!! This is the way I feel for Michael!! I FUCKING LOVE IT!!! IT'S A MASTERPIECE!!! AWWWWWW.... i know what you mean, every ounce of it. i feel the same. wonderful write. i love it!!!!=]
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thankx*tear* lol if i had morea writing experince i'd try writing for other ppl...but i cant lol but yea...i thought u wud understand lol
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chea alwayz
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eltee must be doin good by you to be having you feel the way you do. But I always dig the way you write, but anyways, I got so many people talkin to me at once now, and if I don't get my comment down fast enough, I'll get confused on what they're tryna talk to me about. But anyways, great write, sorry to be in a rush but I'll actually take time to actually read it slowly and get the deeper meaning of the poem. 4give me please.
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This is very nicely done. There were a few points where the flow was choopy, but other than that, it was very well written. Thanks for sharing, KP
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This is really sweet. I like your rhymes in this poem.
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wow...
i feel the same way about the guy i love! we are so much in love, it's really possible that he'll ask me to marry him!(hopefully after college tho) your poem is great i really love it!
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we need plan to sometime hopefully in the next 5years...like he jus left for college soo..yea.but thanx
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