Beyond th realm of imagination,
I strole between the ocean's tongue,
Along the long wide sandy beach,
I watch as the birds dance with the waves on the horizon,
Standing with the sand between my toes,
Hearing the whispers from her on the cold sea air,
My glistening wet footprints in the sand,
Are like human breadcrumbs
Spread along my chosen pathway,
My long brown hair blowing behind me,
In the crystal clear breezes,
Looking into the deep waters,
Seeing her shimmering scales,
Beneath the water's surface,
Her graceful movements,
Creates a song of its very own,
She's crying, howling and calling,
How can she get into my head like she does?
The waves are her words,
Spread in sentences all along the jagged coastline,
Her calls and whispers that chase,
Back and forth along the white beaches,
I wonder back along where my footprints were,
My footprints that were...
Slowly licked away by the ocean,
I look out towards the nearby headland,
To see her sat on a rock,
Her beautiful long blue tail,
Glittering in the sunlight,
And wrapped around the base of the rock,
To steady herself..
Whilst she grooms her long golden curly locks,
I blink slowly, almost like time has frozen,
Only to see that she has gone,
Was she ever there at all?
Or was she just an imaginary friend...?
Author notes
When ppl talk about myths and legends - I'm referring to mermaids here(!) I thought about some stories that you hear in films, they are often referred to as sat on rocks 'admirring' themselves or 'grooming' and often very hidden...fisherman who claimed to have seen them had only caught a slight look or glimpse, which is what i hoped to capture in this write. hope u liked it and let me know what u think!
In a list
A contest entry
- Mermaids!!! Prewrites allowed!! by HugsForEveryone.
525 points, ended August 29, 2007, 15 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - TONS OF OPTIONS!!! Please enter and give it a try, I want a lot more entries! by perfectsunset.
450 points, ended September 7, 2007, 63 entries
Honorable mention
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - wow....... by kitkat92.
450 points, ended December 15, 2007, 27 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 10 of 10
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i really like the first two lines. they really pull you in and keep you reading while also putting an image already in your mind. good job. i did feel like i was on a sandy beach in the sun. very descriptive.
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SOme great imagery in this one! Although I have to agree it made me feel like I was on the beach with the sun beating down and children playing in the sand! Thanks for sharing this and best wishes!
Frogz~ -
Though I liked this poem and what it represented,
it made me feel I was on a sandy beach
instead of a ride on a mgaical Ap polar express.
warm thoughts
Tearz -
I totally loved this poem. I haven't really read any poems about mermaids yet, and this was just awesome! The imagery was well described. My fav. lines would have to be the first stanza, and "Hearing the whispers from her on the cold sea air,
My glistening wet footprints in the sand,
Are like human breadcrumbs
Spread along my chosen pathway" I like how you compared footprints in the sand to breadcrumbs, very original! Although in the first stanza, instead of Along the long wide sandy beach, you might want to maybe word it differently like " And the long, wide.." Just a suggestion. But overall, it was a treasure to read! Best of luck and thanks for entering my contest -
This was just plain AWESOME!!! Thank you so much for entering my contest, I loved this poem. Thank you for reading my rules, I hope you have fun in my contest!!!
~Pandy~
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fantastic
This grips you and makes you want to keep reading you can feel the power emotion and belief you have put into it. Well done -
So descriptive!
I like too much!
The ideas of mermaids is awesome.
And the thought that they are also an imaginary friend...it's crazy. I like it so much it just makes me...giddy! Very nice.
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I liked your poem very discriptive. a little long for me to critque on though
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thank you for your nice comment, but in reading some of the other entries, I don't think its a patch of any of them!!
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Wonderful
Very well done. A nice creative piece. Best of luck in the contest.
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