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Ripping Canvas

Every thought kills...

Every memory devastates...

Every reminder frays...

Every flicker irritates...

I'm trapped by your eyes
and what they held for me.
But I was blinded by your light
and just couldn't see.
The shadow cast behind
was my evil heart.
Corrupting your bright canvas,
destroying your work of art.

Author notes

This began as a song. Probably still is, just not finished. Enjoy... or not.

Please tell me what you think

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Comments

1 - 11 of 11

  • A-Sky-Lark
    January 22, 2008

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    enjoyed much. simple yet full of meaning. Don't know how i went so long without your poetry nick, i missed it. Seems to fit at the moment.

  • dillpickle62
    December 29, 2007

    Edit | Reply

    Title caught my eye.

    Yep needs an ending. But starting out great! ..And great title.
    Saw the cool flame and followed it. A constuction worker huh?. Well it shouldn't strike me funny. I'm a landscaper and jack of all trades. We poets travel in many jobs. Where husbands lock doors and Kings prepare prisons. hahaha...
    Are you in a band?


  • Lady Altheia
    September 4, 2007

    Edit | Reply

    Hoodwinked

    Such strong emotions. I like the title. It grbas your attention. I could see how this was a song. You been hoodwinked by a poetic bandit.


  • ronnica
    August 27, 2007
    Edit | Reply
    I did enjoy I hope you go on to finish it as a song, as it has a strange appeal.


  • tawk gold member
    August 24, 2007

    Edit | Reply

    Hood-Winked!

    Wow this would make wonderful lyrics. You are such an amazing writer don't ever think anything less. Wow I am in awe at your way with words. Keep it up. I so enjoyed this poem

    You have just been Hood-Winked courtesy of the Poetic Bandits


  • debilynn gold member
    August 23, 2007

    Edit | Reply

    HOOD WINKED!!!

    well written. full of emotion. great imagery. thank you for sharing this. keep writing! God bless you always


  • lost-in-yesterday
    August 19, 2007
    Edit | Reply
    this is amazing. i love it. why am i so surprise? lol yet again amazing job


  • lost-in-yesterday
    August 19, 2007
    Edit | Reply
    this is amazing. i love it. why am i so surprise? lol yet again amazing job


  • Justified Inc.
    August 11, 2007

    Edit | Reply

    Regretful

    Seems full of hinds sight and regret. I love the line "The shadow cast behind was my evil heart." So enveloped by it all! Very intense and leads me to a beauty and the beast contemplation. Nice.
    Castaway~poet


  • Never Fall in Love
    August 6, 2007
    Edit | Reply
    The only way I'm liking this is if you sing it.
    Ooo, that's an idea...
    Nick, pick up the phone - I'm calling you and you're singing this.

    oh wait ... my phone is dead
    *sigh*
    I still wanna hear you sing it.

    Though ... if you add on more to this, let me know.
    But it's good as it is. Great effect with that as the end.


  • samara11278
    August 6, 2007
    Edit | Reply
    Writing a song? I want to hear it if you finish! I guess you'll just have to come out here!

1 - 11 of 11