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Splash

Shining droplets leap from below
Bored of the rivers gentle flow
Shimmering and Sparkling
On their joyous flight
Basking in freedom
They dance with delight




Author notes

Vladimir Kulakov

A contest entry

Please tell me what you think

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    Comment Suggestion: What is your your first impression?
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Comments

1 - 27 of 27

  • Hebz
    September 21, 2007

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    Amazing imagery....

    I love how you say it all & i like the title so much

    Thnx for entering & Best of Luck

    GloriousGift
    Heba


  • tara wilson gold member
    September 19, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    I really like the personification of the water droplets, wanted more from the boring flow of the river - very creative piece, thank you for this entry!


  • opaqueangel
    September 19, 2007
    Edit | Reply
    very interesting, but unfortuntely you failed to put the option number in your authors box. As this was a rule I am goin to have to dq you. Sorry. I hope you understand!


  • Lauren Noir
    August 30, 2007
    Edit | Reply
    This is a lovely short but sweet piece, I liked the length, it was soft and just sunk in sweetly

    I loved the name, it sugested something comical or very simple, but the words were intricate and beautiful and just amazing
    I loved the way they sunk in, and trickled over me

    The flow was lovely
    Lovely imagreary
    Well done
    Good luck

    Thanks for entering

  • Virgoan
    August 28, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    Soft and short. Very good piece fellow poet.

    Thanks for sharing and I wish you all the best in the contest. Keep writing my friend.

    >>>VIRGOAN


  • BeautifulNitemare
    August 28, 2007
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    I've decided to give you an honorable mention! Go you!!!


  • Ray Von
    August 26, 2007
    Edit | Reply
    Suprisingly enough, I didn't find this very strong. Sweet poem.
    Thank you for entering.
    MAria


  • Purplemoondoll
    August 26, 2007

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    Lovely

    I see this has won a few contests already - I can see why - great imagery in such a few lines - good luck

  • Mercury Rising
    August 22, 2007

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    Short and sweet and really quite delightful. Best of luck in my contest, and thanks for entering.

    David


  • BeautifulNitemare
    August 22, 2007

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    sorry u didnt make the finalist list, but the poem was great. it just wasn't what I was looking for. But don't stop writing! keep on going and good luck in the future!
    ~Bethany~


  • xxRainbowDawnxx
    August 19, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    I love water and most things to do with it. I like dolphins too and so does my sister, they are just such beautiful creatures and so very clever, compared to what most people think they are.


    • Dageek2
      August 19, 2007
      Edit | Reply
      Exactly. I hate it when people think I'm lying when I say animals like dolphins and elephants are almost as smart as humans.


  • Riftkin gold member
    August 18, 2007
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    short poem

    big impact

    nice

  • BeautifulNitemare
    August 15, 2007
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    nice

    love ur little poem and how it rhymes. good luck
    ~Bethany~


  • Simply Olivia
    August 15, 2007
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    Very Nice!


  • KnightOfTheRose gold member
    August 12, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    wow very good I really like this piece! short and to the point great job! Thank you so much for entering! Excellent work and the best of luck in my contest!!!


    -Steve-


  • islekine gold member
    August 9, 2007
    Edit | Reply

    I like it!

    Thanks for entering.
    *PEACE*


  • Pamela A Lamppa silver member
    August 8, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    Very nicely done. Congratulations on your beautiful shining bauble. So worth of this and much more.


  • amaranthine lover gold member
    August 8, 2007
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    beautifully exciting


  • Jasmine Rayne
    August 8, 2007

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    It's short but says a lot. This poem is great. Thank you for entering in my contest and good luck. Keep writing!


  • squeezy
    August 8, 2007

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    Great vocabulary.

    This is such a short poem, but also such a good one. You've chosen really perfect vocabulary, needing hardly anything else. There is no need for punctuation, and your line lengths are neat but flexible.

    Thanks for this entry and good luck!


  • opaqueangel
    August 6, 2007
    Edit | Reply
    Awsome imagery, I really enjoyed reading this peice. It was short, to the point and you really managed to make me imagine it. Great wrok and good luck in the contest.


  • Fairies on Fire
    August 6, 2007

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    i like this,...it sparkles like the droplets...good job. if you were ever going to add to this to make it a little longer maybe add some metaphor or something..i love metaphor but this is still a pretty damn good write anyway..thanks for entering take care xxx


  • DogTagz-TheJalapeno
    August 5, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    i really like this one....short and sweet and just plain awesome....good job



    kayla


  • Deindichter
    August 5, 2007

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    Excellent personification of the droplets both leaping and becoming bored. Well done. The flow was nicely done too, I would suggest only trying to add a comma or something every 1-2 lines. Your choice of course, but it would allow the poems flow to be directed as opposed to the individual reader deciding how it should flow. good job.

1 - 27 of 27