your fingertips
across my skin
a leaf
falls,
see-
saws
down
through the air
into the small of my back
your hand pours
the softest sound
Author notes
pianissimo is a musical term meaning: to play very softly
A contest entry
- Quickie Quest ~ Prewrite Party 2 by Namita.
300 points, ended October 6, 2007, 95 entries
Gold trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 80 of 80
-
this is amazing! it seems, perfect!
-
I dont even know what to say
this was just one of those writes...
~aj~
-
gentle as a baby's sigh
-
Sigh. Wow. Beautiful. What else can I say Nic... I just wish I could stop my tears again.
-
beautiful...It sounds quiet and gentle; a truly peaceful and wonderful feeling.
-
see-
saws
down
through the air
Oh, this is so ... stellar. No, i refrain from saying anything as it does not do this poem justice. Let us allow it to speak in its silenced beauty ...
Your words are so simple, so graceful, so elegant to the touch. The poems you write have meaning, stories, messages!
listen to the sound of poetic sensations ...
-
-
Asfand, thank you so much - and of course to Candy too for sending you my way. I am smiling right now!
-
-
yay!
my thanks to her too, for having me read your poems, it is a journey into another world!
keep penning and leaving me in awe!
-
-
-
Breathtaking,came to re read after seeing your contest re hands,indeed this is inspirational and sensational.
-
-
Thank you, Yvette
-
-
Oh yes! Pianissimo and piano are beautiful expressions... and so breathtaking! Such a sensual write... you make me jealous...
"into the small of my back
your hand pours
the softest sound"
Soft... beautiful...
-
-
Thank you so much, Kandy - this is one of my own personal favourites too
-
-
The name of this poem is just so bright and so new. I loved the whole idea and the way you compared... You are a truly great poet. With only a few words you have created a work of art.
Maria -
the worded image almost as divine as the... skin sensation it sugggests. or is it... memory, sometimes the sweetest of all realities?
-
-
I think it is both Joe...the memory of skin perhaps? Thanks for the visit, my friend
-
-
after this, i feel like making luv . . .
-
Ah!!! My kind of image so soft and sensual...make me jealous I didn't write it...beautiful...African Queen of sultry wetness
-
cold shower time lol...
-
-
lol
-
-
very nice, tunes in words, and the lines steps were those of a dance...
thanks
Ali
-
-
Thank you Ali....
-
-
Painissimo: love play, rhythms and pulse, softly vibrant only as the depths of a deep water woman song...
-
-
Thank you, dear Karen - you always leave such wonderful comments
-
-
Yeah
Yes, Nicole this is a very soft play with words and yet so sensual and lovely. I don't know how you manage to pack so much of punch into so few words and make it beautiful at the same time.
Good luck in the contest.
Love and blessings from India - Joel -
-
-
Thank you, dear Joel... I hope to visit your pages soon too
-
-
Truly divine, this is such a classic portrayal of the gentleness of true love… this speaks of tenderness and a passion that few are ever privileged enough to experience.
Good luck in the contest
~Dini~
-
very delicately worded...
simple and soft and lovely!
-
This is a really good poem, fits your 'prompt' exactly.. ANd I absolutely love your form.. Anyway.. I hope you do well in the contest, not like you'll need my luck.
-Danneh -
pianisimo
very good,.. sensual short and sweet! -
lovely, just absolutely wonderful...that was beautiful, and short, just the way i like them
-
Perfectism~~~~~~~~~
Perfectisimo''~Enjoyed it very much....Loved it.....'"God Bless You Nicoltte'.Love, Shirley shaw, from Ah, you Knoiw Where.lol....Take care...............;...Short, Sweet, And Once Again, To The Point~~~~~~~~~`~~~~~~~~~~~`~~~~~~~~~~~~
-
Well, as usual you turn the simplist action into poetic beauty. Autumn should be so glorified more often like this. I just think you should have reversed the sequence of writing this piece with the Poet Goes Soft in the Head because, well, never mind. Seriously, this is a lovely use of imagery to compliment sensuality -- and it is done with the perfect tonal quality (i.e. the internal rhyme and half-rhyme of "leaf" v. "see" and "falls" v. "saws"). Great piece Nicolette. Now, about my request for more of those Poet Goes Soft in the Head poems...
-
-
That "poet goes soft in the head" was a bit of a departure for me, lol - they only come once in a blue moon (got to think of my reputation here). Thanks, Monte - always enjoy your comments.
-
-
the clappy guys didn't register...
-
-
Thank you, Zayra
-
-
gorgeous.
-
This is beautiful. So short but so much captured in those ten or so lines. The title fits in so well with the poem, when in truth it is quite unrelated. Amazing piece!
-
The gentle falling of leaves and their journey to where they are caught is blended into this gentle daydream. It's strange how something you see can become so sensuous.
Very wonderful thought.
-
I like the softness of this piece. The tone is so brilliant! Thanks for sharing.
VIRGOAN
-
how can something so short, be so sensual, you as i'm reading this poem i can feel my hand. well never mind.
great work
-
-
Thanks for the lovely comment, Marctheman. I guess it's not in the what but in the how!
-
-
i love, "a leaf falls...see saws...down through the air." I agree with my Artiste...this is a very sensual piece. Love, Lane
-
-
Thanks, Lane..
-
-
oooh....this is a sexy little poem
very sensual
very tactile
I can feel it
-
Your words cascade quietly...gently down the page, beautiful imagery you paint us with your colorful mind Lovely work, my pleasure to read ~Tia
-
Gorgeous, sensual...soft as a whisper. I love the title; it fits beautifully.
-
It is a quiet Monday morning, birds and sunlight outside the open window as I type this. A perfect moment to fall softly into the delicate peacefulness of your words. You always have an ability to calm me, to soothe me with the beauty of your words Nic. You are a gift to all of us who take the time to read your gentle musings. Bless you, sister, bless you . . . Marc
-
-
Thank you, Marc for the beauty of your words too, my friend
-
-
beautiful, seductive, sensual
I feel the flow of the music
wonderfully done keep writing
-
i love how yiou made the poem match the title. not through only visuals that were great but also through the effect of the poem and the way it gently danced across my mind as i read it... wonderfull
-
This is an absolutely marvellous write. I personally am into darker poetry but this is great. It flows well and the term pianissimo fits it well. You're a fabulous writer. Keep up the great work.
-
Oh my! This is fabulous! The title fits so well, the words sound like almost a whisper, as though you should speak them in a hushed voice. The structure is also really interesting, in the middle it was like the words were the leaf falling down.
-
clicked due to chosen title...yeah, soft and gentle like my love...hmmm very nice...
-
absolutely lovely..I love the way the reader has to drift down the page, and what a landing..
the last stanza is perfect.
-
-
Thanks, Kathleen...
-
-
this is verry beautiful, i love the way it looks on the page too
-
And while
my eyes saunter
then shutter
soft is the breeze
in gentle refrain
left linger
in my mind
are images
felt
breathless
I
become
Malabu
-
oh... *sigh*
how beautiful my friend, how beautiful...
-
For me it was easy to relate with your words. Sounds from piano are simply...incomparable, to me the same is with the soft sound of flute. Perfect.
~Sonja~
-
-
You have such a soft touch too, Sonja - I love flute sounds too... thank you
-
-
Chopin I think was in love with his instrument, so too you in love with this words as you wrote them. How else could his music or your words, fall so softly.
bb
-
-
Chopin..."berceuse"... thanks, bb.
-
-
the small of a woman's back - such a soft image as that to show a kind of adoration that other gestures just can't compare with...
so soft and lovely with that image of the leaf see-saw arching with the image of her back in that same form in my mind as the reader.
stunning as always.
-
-
Thank you for the lovely comment, Kim... I have a very special memory associated with the small of a back
-
-
the cummings-esk falling leaf used as metaphor in a wonderfully effective way, setting up the closing stanza perfectly...
al
-
You have the sweetest touch upon the keys and words dear Nicolette, the melody in this is exquisite and a joy to read. Love, C
-
and the tones that might rise, lilting on the air,
in gentle arpeggios... simply beautiful poetry...PK
-
Beautifully done! The controlling image is lovely and helps create a wonderfully sensuous tone. Chris.
-
Beautiful music Nic! Love this one!
~Lyrical
-
"into the small of my back
your hand pours
the softest sound"
Ohhh. Ooohhh, Nic. What a gorgeous poem this is, my Friend. I wish you'd written even more & entered it in my contest, Sweetie. Hell, I just wish you'd write more. Not that you need to; you always say so much so well with the fewest words imaginable. Wonderful writing, my Sister. Vlindertjie
-
Dreaming sighs and salutations! Stunning format; word choice and a very strong final stanza.
So much beauty lives within that ink, I'm sure that even the pen was envious.
-
This is such a soft and serene piece of beauty defined by sound. Lovely form and flow! An excellent poem indeed!
-
Do my eyes deceive me, or is your poem in the shape of a musical
note! Anyhoo, that is my eyes view...
Your Poem is so light and airy with the uniquely placed sensual connotations.
I love it ...Sigh, Dreamy!
Exquisite, Poet. ~ Nicholas ~
-
-
Thank you, Nicholas.. I like the way your eyes see - a musical note!!
-
-
like a piano on sand sprinkling on the dusk of time...
Tamara
-
So gentle
I smile...I am wowed as always, but this one has a common link for us. Now when I hear a certain tune I have this beautiful image to accompany it. Beautiful my sister. Soft as a dove.
-
-
Thank you, dear sis...for the inspiration and for so much more
-
-
So beautiful...and the place for this to post might be some mountain poets heart...
-
beautiful
Adding your comment:
1 - 80 of 80
