As the tears fall from my eyes
I sit there and look at the sky
And I wonder why
You felt you had to lie
I wonder why I see cocaine hearts
At least when I'm high
I touch you with my hands
I dig my nails into your face
As I hit you with bullet kisses
Glittering eyes
And heart wrenching lies
Building in your sharp catlike gaze
Love filled thoughts
Warp my once virgin mind
Now my mind is dirtied
By your crazed obsessions
With a lie
You refer to as love
Lost unto this world
Falling into an endless pit of hell
With long forgotten wishes
And wonderings
That I question in the night
Before I lay my head to rest
On this cold stone bed
This immediate wanting
And mind blowing torture
Fills my mind
I shriek in pain
As my pure heart
Is ripped from my chest
Taken and stomped on
By your meaningless existence
Your treacherous mind lied to me
And denied me of my love
As you touched me
And sealed my dead lips
With your own
I knew that eternal love bound us together
Author notes
Ok...
Well I'd like to be a little sister. My name is Sami. You can find out more about me on my page.
xoxoxo
A contest entry
- ♥lots of options♥ come see♥ by oldphotosonlybringt.
800 points, ended August 7, 2007, 21 entries
Honorable mention
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Are you creative, original, unique....? Then you're up for this challenge! by Heavens Child.
770 points, ended August 19, 2007, 33 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - The Best and The Worst by Epilogue.
550 points, ended August 29, 2007, 32 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - AP Family by Theory Of The Lost.
390 points, ended January 18, 2008, 26 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Anything and everything! by My Selfish Romance.
300 points, ended January 26, 2008, 97 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 6 of 6
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"With a lie
You refer to as love"
I really like this line. But i'm lacking some sort of connection to the poem as a reader. I like the concept of the once-virgin mind and some of the metaphors you use but some of them are not my style like :
"As my pure heart
Is ripped from my chest
Taken and stomped on
By your meaningless existence"
a bit too dark and cliche for me. Sorry.
Thank you for the entry and keep writing. Don't let anyone discourage you- after all it's only opinion.
~elizabeth~
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This is an amazing write... the imagery is very strong and dramatic. Unfortunately, the entries in the contest couldn't be previously entered in a contest or have won a trophy.... please feel free to enter another poem. Regardless, it's a fantastic piece of poetry.
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Purple Pen
Love is wonderful when it's wonderful, but it sucks so bad when it's not. You used powerful, visceral imagery to convey your agony. Good work! PP -
scary scary but yet so good.
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that was truly amazing the imagery was just spectacular. i really enjoyed it. your second stanza especially was one of the greatest pieces i have read here. and that is saying a lot the word just say more than there shallow meanings they run deeper than the sea. "cocaine kisses" "bullet kisses" your good really good.
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♥
hay sweetie, well one amazing poem!!!
and i love how it gave off a lot of imagry to me, nice wright sweetie, best luck in the contest all my love..xoxoxox
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