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Letting Go

Dry eyes, dry mouth
I lie in wait for something to believe in

I fear I've lost my way, fallen off the path 

But somehow I manage to get back up again 

I wonder does anyone ever think of me

Do they know what goes on inside? 

Do they even really know who I am? 

If they do, would they please tell me 

I see myself as different to the rest

I hate to follow a universal trend 

But in doing so, am I alienating myself? 

Am I rejecting what I should embrace? 

I feel my head swelling, I feel it letting go

Of potentially damaging secrecies

I'm glad of this release I've been granted 

And that I will never know what they were

Author notes

Written on 1st August 2007 at 00:24 GMT

This is the second poem I've written in months. Also taken from a mix of challenges given to me through my contest: secrets of me and writing in the moment.

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Comments

1 - 13 of 13
  • Annorlunda
    December 29, 2009

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    I can definitely relate to this. It could easily be a poem describing my life and the feeling of isolation, which you penned so majestically and accurately in this poem.


  • Justice Morton
    December 28, 2009

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    Wow

    The fact that this didnt rhyme only added to its seriousness. I think we all question our existence from time to time. I know i've been lately. Great write, thanks for sharing.


  • polkaa
    December 28, 2009
    Edit | Reply
    Beautiful


  • grampabob1946 silver member
    December 27, 2009
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    Beautiful

    Simply Touching
    I wish I had written it.

  • Derek-94
    December 27, 2009

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    Wow! This one made me think. Even though it did not rhyme, the meter was very easy to follow. It could have rhymed, but it would not have made a difference. It took a little guess work, and I love that.


  • BigSpiral
    December 27, 2009
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    I like the descriptive begining. its good to have a good begining.

  • jewelDove12
    December 27, 2009
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    i really like this poem and i can relate to it a lot love ya jeweldove12


  • drybones
    December 27, 2009

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    I can relate fully to this piece for I recognize the landscape. I call it the valley of despair and I have walked through that lonely place many times.

    Your imagery is born of personal pain and struggle, which is why it has such emotional impact in this sad but beautifully written piece.

    I applaud the talent and artistry but remind you that the darkest night flees before the rising sun and the road that runs through the valley of despair doesn't end there.

    Well done,
    Drybones


  • words-n-stuff gold member
    December 27, 2009

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    Bravo !

    Interesting .... Who is the 'they' you refer to ? ... Why are you 'different' to the rest ?
    As far as the contest prompt is concerned ' secrets of me and writing in the moment' ... I don't think you have really nailed the essence of the contest. As contentious as your piece is, there are more statements 'written in the moment' I grant you, but there are no 'secrets of me' revealed to perhaps throw a bit more light on the subject. What is 'the universal trend' ? you speak of ? .....

    I like the opening lines - 'Dry eyes, dry mouth - I lie in wait for something to believe in' ... charged with so much potential but fails to deliver anything outside the generic. There is so much anger within these lines that could make for something really special ... something that might grab us by the throat and scream 'Listen to me' !!

    How would anybody know ' What goes on inside' ? ... unless you actually told them, and if it was in fact anything you particularly wanted to discuss. 

    Having said all that though, I might have completely misinterpreted your piece and the contest prompt altogether !

    But that's the fun of poetry and the written word I suppose ....... 

    Bravo !


    • DefinitiveFreak gold member
      December 27, 2009
      Edit | Reply
      The contest was my contest, where the winner had to give me a challenge. I did write in the moment, I wrote what first came to mind. Thanks for reading.


  • Written
    December 27, 2009
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    Amazing!

    Your poem is just really good! I love the way you write and i hope to read even more...


  • shubs
    December 27, 2009

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    Fab

    Fabulous and is the full form of my verdict and it stays that way for the feeling you imbibe and emit in your lines is what I have experienced so long and so many times and would not have put all those emotions so beautifully like the way you did
    God Bless You
    Shubs


  • pattyann4500
    August 5, 2007

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    This is an excellent piece, Laura. I guess we all go through those times when the words won't come, but for only the second you've written in months, you've come up with a wonderful and telling piece. Hugs, Patricia

1 - 13 of 13