I crossed my fingers through my hair and scolded my reflection; "you shouldn't care, you shouldn't care." and words were just empty vases, filled up by rocking chairs and the creaking of old floors. I have you on the brain and him in my eyes, and i'm snapping my hairbands across my wrists for the sheer joy of see-through veins.
i stab a pencil through my thumb to watch the sparkles fall out. Apple sauce and pulsing heart aches, and you're on the cover of a magazine i've never read. Fingersticks across your waist, my soul is overflowing and my head is tired. I'm sick of pills and floating on the edge of my seat. I'm sick of drugs on rooftops and I'm sick of stars crashing into my ribs.
You were my broken doll, my pretty little windup that always walked with a lilt, that always had it's head a little lagging and it's foot dragging on the floor. You were my empty tree, complete without leaves or a place for me to climb. You were a sidewalk without cracks and a double rainbow in the sky. You were smiles and fumbling fingers, a numb spot on the back of my head. You were the tingles you feel when a foot falls asleep, the man on the moon dancing in the clouds. You were my perfect, and I was your nothing.
And I know ["I shouldn't care, I shouldn't care."]
But sometimes babe, you just make it so fucking hard.
Author notes
Tinkerbell-Or-Me
Fairy Dust♥
Chyeahhhhbby--->ILY!
I might add more too it? if that's okay.
i'm not too sure, i can't write anymore baby, i'm sorry this is crappy =[
A contest entry
- Rib Cage Pianos and Cancer Stick Affairs. by PaperChainHearts.
550 points, ended August 15, 2007, 7 entries
Gold trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
cry to me and tell me it's all gonna be fine.
Comments
1 - 13 of 13
-
So you really thought this was bad? You need more reviewers to tell you it's amazing; maybe when there are enough you'll believe them. Seriously. This was full of so much imagery and interesting metaphors. Gorgeous.
-
somehow all your poetry leaves me feeling bare.. like fresh salt licked wounds of my past calling agn... or maybe i jst like to call it my past.
i love it...
You were my perfect, and I was your nothing.
And I know ["I shouldn't care, I shouldn't care."]
But sometimes babe, you just make it so fucking hard.
-
you shouldn't care." and words were just empty vases, filled up by rocking chairs and the creaking of old floors.
i love this.
I'm sick of drugs on rooftops and I'm sick of stars crashing into my ribs.
i want to highlight all of this. i have no favourite part. i cant have it's too amazing sweetie
♥ -
wow, this was great. i love the abundance of emotion in this. sorta like a love/hate type of thing. and nice ending.
-
your imagery is playful, creative, and brilliant. the poems flows effortlessly. and the feelings you evoke seem as if they were my own, because you write so transparently that i feel like i can see into you. (and of course, it helps that many of them are ones i can relate to. including being tired of floating in your chair
)
you are a genius. your style is unlike anything else, and your sense of self, of your own voice, is unbelievable. i have written poetry for five years, and yet i am in awe.
i have not been so impressed by a poem in months.
kudos ten thousand times m'dear!
-
I loooove the way you write.
this leaves me speechless. how are you so good??!
stunning my dear. just beautiful.
"You were a sidewalk without cracks and a double rainbow in the sky. You were smiles and fumbling fingers, a numb spot on the back of my head. You were the tingles you feel when a foot falls asleep, the man on the moon dancing in the clouds. You were my perfect, and I was your nothing.
And I know ["I shouldn't care, I shouldn't care."]
But sometimes babe, you just make it so fucking hard."
-
i stab a pencil through my thumb to watch the sparkles fall out. Apple sauce and pulsing heart aches, and you're on the cover of a magazine i've never read. Fingersticks across your waist, my soul is overflowing and my head is tired. I'm sick of pills and floating on the edge of my seat. I'm sick of drugs on rooftops and I'm sick of stars crashing into my ribs.
wow. i lovelovelove this. its amazing sugar!
well done <3 -
I'm sick of drugs on rooftops and I'm sick of stars crashing into my ribs.
You were my broken doll, my pretty little windup that always walked with a lilt, that always had it's head a little lagging and it's foot dragging on the floor. You were my empty tree, complete without leaves or a place for me to climb. You were a sidewalk without cracks and a double rainbow in the sky. You were smiles and fumbling fingers, a numb spot on the back of my head. You were the tingles you feel when a foot falls asleep, the man on the moon dancing in the clouds. You were my perfect, and I was your nothing.
this piece is just...stunning.
absolutely beautiful.
and you call this crappy!?!?!
you never cease to amaze me, cuppycake.
i ♥ you.
-
another gold trophy.. ><
haha
you are a good writer
and i can barely write now
just some lyrics
of missing emotion.. =[
i sware i am so emotionless after the past two years
its fucking crazy
its so weird.. i used to be superemotional.. everything but mad.. now i am only mad..
or nothing.
=[
i am the people i tried to protect myself from.. -
"i stab a pencil through my thumb to watch the sparkles fall out. Apple sauce and pulsing heart aches, and you're on the cover of a magazine i've never read. Fingersticks across your waist, my soul is overflowing and my head is tired. I'm sick of pills and floating on the edge of my seat. I'm sick of drugs on rooftops and I'm sick of stars crashing into my ribs. "
Ohh bby this is wonderous!!
Deff NOT crappy!
I love it<333
-
REALLY GOOD. it was amazing. keep up the great writing!
-
"I have you on the brain and him in my eyes, and i'm snapping my hairbands across my wrists for the sheer joy of see-through veins."
&
"I'm sick of drugs on rooftops and I'm sick of stars crashing into my ribs."
&
"You were a sidewalk without cracks and a double rainbow in the sky. You were smiles and fumbling fingers, a numb spot on the back of my head. You were the tingles you feel when a foot falls asleep, the man on the moon dancing in the clouds. You were my perfect, and I was your nothing.
And I know ["I shouldn't care, I shouldn't care."]
But sometimes babe, you just make it so fucking hard."
...okay so I pretty much just reposted your entire piece. Shit. I couldn't narrow it down any further to which ones were my favorites because... this is... amazing.
vivid imagery and wonderrrrful emotions. I am seriously in love with those three bits that I just posted. Your words are so gorgeous and quoteable and delcious anddddd FUCKING PERFECT. damn. seriously.
-
I don't know how to comment, your writing is always so unique and amazing. Sometimes, there are parts I don't understand at first, but eventually it all comes together and leaves me wow-ed.
"You were my perfect, and I was your nothing."
"my soul is overflowing and my head is tired"
"I have you on the brain and him in my eyes"
These three lines are my favorite, and the ones I relate to most...
You are brilliant
♥
Adding your comment:
1 - 13 of 13
