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Hold Strong

Break apart the chains,
of your outer shell
Let them into the pain,
You swore to never tell.

Break that heart into the peices
you swore to never make.
Hold her shattered existance,
as the life you said you'd never take.

Now on the floor she sits alone
unaware of her life.
Following a broken heart,
Ends only in the knife.

Hold strong sweet angel.
Don't let him break you apart.
Keep you eyes to the sky.
For a new life sure to start.

Please tell me what you think

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Comments


  • So Strange
    August 17, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    Very nice poem you got here, broken-down-slippers. I really enjoyed it and thought you did an amazing job explaining and putting emotion into the poem.

    I especially liked the verse:

    Hold strong sweet angel.
    Don't let him break you apart.
    Keep you eyes to the sky.
    For a new life sure to start.

    SELF CONFIDENCE and CONTROL!!! That's what I say to that verse...it was great...

    Your writing wasn't so bad, either, except for one mistake in line 15, where you say 'you' instead of 'your'.

    Keep on writing!


    • broken-down-slippers
      August 17, 2007
      Edit | Reply

      O.O

      OMG!!! Your right. I made a mistake... T.T Ehh.. Ok. Well hi. I am Rei. Your Cinda's buddy right? =]


      • So Strange
        August 17, 2007
        Edit | Reply
        Yeah, if by CINDA you mean the-gifted, then yes. I'm her buddy.