how dare you say you loved me?
how dare you make me love you?
how dare you be so deceitful,
when I've done nothing to you
you lied to me
you changed your ways
at least I thought you did
turns out its the real you
how dare you blame this all on me
when you're the one who lied
you're the one who cheated
you're a good for nothing scumbag
so go crawl up that hell hole you came from
because you do nothing but cause pain here
and people like you
is something this world can do without
the anger you cause within my heart
is something words cannot describe
so don't torment me with your fake apologies
these lips are something you shall never get again
Author notes
love happens once in a lifetime. the difference lies in how many time you're willing to live in the time that you're alive.
A contest entry
- 3 Part Contest: Part 1- Rage [[BIG POINTS]] by GiftedPsychosis.
1500 points, ended August 7, 2007, 26 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - oogaboogashoogalooga...this is serious by Starlette.
525 points, ended December 7, 2007, 150 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
-
Firstly, let me say apologies for the late judgement of this contest, You've put so much passion and emotion into here. The structure and the punctuation or lack thereof really hinder this piece as a whole but if you tweaked it a bit, it could be more. The anger is incredibly present and it really aids the piece, but i do think some more concentration on the smaller things, would bring it up to a whole new level. Thanks for the entry and best of luck in the contest,
-
Woah! I can definitely see the rage in this piece!!
Great job and good luck in the contest! -
um--val--
is there something going on I should know about? -
-
no
lol it was for a rage contest so i just thought bout matt...nothings goin on...the ones i write that are angry are usually bout matt that i just feel inspired to write, or about jesse....he has been a scumbag lately....but loveydovey ones are berky..duh....and the suicidal ones...I AM NOT SUICIDAL..lol...I'm just amazing at writin bout those cuz of the whole going through that this year and 7th grade...lol...so don't worry im fdine...actually never been better lol
-
Adding your comment:
