I don’t know how to tell you
of all you mean to me
It don’t think that it matters
that your face, I’ll never see.
I can’t express the pain I feel
to lose you, precious one.
To say goodbye so suddenly
to my dear and precious son.
I will never get to hold you
in my caring arms, so tight,
or sing you gentle lullabies,
cradle you throughout the night.
I hate the thought of living here
without you next to me,
yet I can not bare to realize
you’re suffering in agony.
I know you are the sweetest child,
the special person that you are.
I will see your shining soul beam
when I see the brightest star.
I have carried you inside me,
you have lived within my heart,
though now I must send you to the Lord,
we will not be far apart.
I will always be your Mommy,
and my Angel, you will sing,
to remind us all to cherish
the love each day can bring.
Our time together here on Earth
has simply passed too quick,
but Mommy knows you need to rest,
Mommy knows that you are sick.
All that is important now
is that you know of Mommy’s love,
as you watch down upon your family
from your Heaven’s home above.
Your big brother, Jason, will be there
at Heaven‘s Gate, you'll meet.
He’ll hold your hand and guide you
to other family you will meet.
I’ll be thankful that you are safe,
that you no longer feel such pain,
and slowly all the hurt will ease
as tears are washed away by rain.
JonThomas, you’ve been a blessing.
We will miss you every day.
Mommy will always talk to you,
each time I kneel to pray.
Someday we'll all be together,
my family will then be complete,
when I arrive at home in Heaven
my sons, I finally will meet.
Author notes
My first words to try to express the sadness I'm feeling right now over knowing that I'm losing my sweet baby, JonThomas. JT has been given no chance of survival...so I will give him back to the Lord so that he may rest and know peace. This is just the beginning, I'm sure, of many attempts to ease the pain. He will join his big brother Jason, who I lost 20 yrs. ago, another son I never got to hold.
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This is so beautiful im sure he is watching over you,i know it is very hard to deal with and to understand Dear God why.Im so sorry for your loss, As I understand it as a mother that has been in your place before.Sending you peace and much love. CJ
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I know this feeling all to well. I had to just come to terms with my own little loss. You expressed your love so well within this read. Just to know they have our love will make there life complete. Well done, well said.
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Touching screen....
lane -
*HUG*
I Applaud the Strength it took just to pen this to paper~ shed the tears after the gates opened to release...
I only see You and Your little one together...
Never separate...If You need anything, I am here
along with countless others
Love and Light Your way-everyday~
Love You bunches for ALL You possess~
Sweet Soul~
and much more Love~ Desire~*~
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What a beautifully written write lil sis, this is so tragic and your words express the sorrow like no can or ever will. My heart goes out to you and your family in your time of grief. Yes you will meet him in paradise and there will be so much to share and do. A mommy's love is such a precious gift. He is in good hands now.
Love ya,
Your big bro,
Charley
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Dear lori, I know you don't know me but I remember you... You left me the loveliest comments/hood-winks when I got the gift of all those hood-winks from the Poetic Bandits...Those comments meant so much to me at a time when I was really sad. I don't think I could ever put into words how much I appreciated them
I am so sorry for what you are going through right now and I know too that no matter how many people say they are sorry, it doesn't make the pain go away. Maybe it feels like the pain will never go away. I've felt like that. Last year a really special friend of mine had to go to heaven. I knew she was dying too but nothing ever prepares you for the moment when you know they've slipped away from earth. I wanted to be really brave for my friend and not cry. I didn't want her to feel bad up in heaven seeing me crying down here but not crying just made me feel worse and I knew she wouldn't want that either. So I did cry and I think that was the bravest I have ever felt. My friend made me brave and I know JonThomas is going to make you really brave because he will always be in your heart. I don't like when people say that people who are in heaven are 'lost' or 'gone' because how can they be gone when they are always in our hearts and thoughts ? I'm sure JonThomas knows how much you love him and he will still know that when he is in heaven too. No illness, or even death, can stop you feeling love
That's what I believe anyway. I hope you don't mind me saying that 
I think JonThomas is already making you brave because you were able to write this poem. It is heart breaking but from your heart, where he will always be.
You are all in my prayers now.
love,
ellie (little-hug)
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my dear sister lori,
again I am crying as I read your words and connect with your soul ... my sleep was very disturbed during last night, and often I woke up "searching" for you to see how you are (as I would do for my family members, when they don't feel well) ... then I prayed, silently, and felt you and your baby so strongly united, and deep, deep within your innermost soul, there was peace ... then, I could sleep again ...
your wisdom is so evident and your faith is so strong, that I am in humble admiration to see you face this unthinkable challenge with so much spiritual maturity ... you are right now one of the most important role-models for all of us here who read you, first of all, myself ... I have rarely met a more profound being in my life than you have proven to be ...
I love you more than you can imagine ...
marion
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I know what you are going through my dear sweet friend and at this time my words just feel useless. Every time I closed my eyes last night all I could see was your face and those lines I read yesterday that left me with a heavy heart. It's easy to say things happen for a reason, that it just was not meant to be but as a mother facing the prospect of losing their already much loved child these words can have an almighty sting to them. As I watched the sky darken last night I prayed for Chloe to look after JT, for them to be there for one another and to guide us as we try to live ou lives without them. The candle is still burning, a constant reminder of what we both have lost. I love you my friend and shall be here for you during what I know shall be a difficult time. Love always, Claire xxx
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Lori,
This is so beautiful. You always have a way with words, but the heart tells it truly. I'm glad you can find some small release in writing.
Thoughts and prayers,
Greg
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And once again I send you warmth to guide you and yours
through the days,
and a great big cyber (((((((hug))))))))
to ease a bit of pain,
Warm thoughts
Frozentearz
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Oh sweetie, once again, It is difficult to express how much I care in words......
I love ya, Sis and you are in my prayers and in my heart
LYnda
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You know...I know this pain, so I will simply applaud the courage it has taken to begin to release this grief and keep you and your family in my prayers ~Tia
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sorry forgot your applause
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Lori,
I know these words are only the begining to a long road of healing for you and your entire family. I shall keep you all in my prayers and close to my heart each and every day and know that absolutely includes both of your boys Jon and Jason. I hope you know they are smiling as they think of you, knowing they have the most incredible mother anyone could possibly be blessed with. If you need anything hun you know how to get in touch with me
Sending much healing
and many prayers and blessings
to you all!
Bel
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DEEPLY TOUCHING!!
We will always lose our loved ones it is so sad that some go to be with the Lord sooner than we expected Our hearts will forever hold their memory and they will be remembered in our prayers.
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Once is once too many, but twice??! I'd say how sorry I am to read of this, but sorry doesn't seem enough.
I can tell you that there is a source to which we all return and nothing there is ever forgotten except for the pain. I don't know what it is - heaven or nirvana or whatever name is chosen - but I do know it's there - I've seen it in a dream where I was allowed to speak to my father for a short time. Everything there was light, so white. I hope knowing this helps.
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Oh, dear one, losing two sons like this is surely enough to break a mother's heart. Know that God loves them, too, though and has been tenderly caring for them and will always do that, for he loves you. A beautiful poem, truly.
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I am in tears as I write this. As a mother myself I have never had to know this pain. I am so sorry for your loss. I am here if you need me, and I will be praying for all of you. Your poem is so full of love for your sons, you truly are a wonderful mother and person. I am here if you need me always remember this. My soul is crying out for you and your family. Theresa
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