A poor child
sitting on a rock
shivering , quivering
fearing from the clock
as every second passes by
increases his suffering
increases his torment
increases his pain
from this merciless world !
All around us
are similar people
suffering most of their lives
but we cant see them
we cant see what they are going through ..
how they feel ..
thats because we are blind ..
blind to reality ..
we see only what we want to see ..
unaware of what is going on ..
and unless that is changed ..
we will never be free ..
bound to eternal darkness ..
Author notes
...
A contest entry
- This Contest Is for Poets With No Trophies by tawk.
450 points, ended August 5, 2007, 9 entries
Honorable winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Une saison en enfer by Aesthete.
1500 points, ended August 24, 2007, 62 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Turn those greenies into Gold (or silver or bronze) pt 5 by whispernthedark.
660 points, ended September 20, 2008, 22 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
So ..
Comments
1 - 12 of 12
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This world can be merciless So many homeless so much hunger and hate. This write made me think about it all. Thank you for sharing this with us
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What a sad and dark poem. It give truth. A harsh truth that people needed to change. You give out you message quite nicely.
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Your message is very true, many people turn a blind eye for fear of letting any unpleasantness disrupt their life. Great write, thank you for entering the contest. Good luck.
♥
whisper
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Bravo bravo Bravooooo
Absolutely amazing..
as I soared through the poem, I stressed on every line or twist or word to find something that'll stumble me..
But there was absolutely nothing to hinder the magnificence of this piece, truly worthy of a gold trophy, not just an honorable mention.
The one and only slight problem was your seemingly forced rhyme on the first paragraph, but truly unnecessary to point out.
It in all, has flowed endlessly beautiful, and there's no need to tell you how far have you hit me with this truth-daring, inner-confronting, similar-to-me, I-hate-the-world, I-am-Kira structure..
Imma bookmark this, because it so far is your best poem ever assembled.
GOOD WORK POET..
wayyyyy to go
Raven
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Thanks man ..
I didnt really think that it was that good u no .. ESHTA
Anyway , u kira and i near .. so u are down bro .. BUAHAHAHAHAHAHA .. hmm , never mind that
ok then , Later man
Be well -
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Hmph..
You near ??
well then I guess that makes you the one who loses..
Because if you thought it right, you'd never be able to outsmart me, unless you have Mello's help, which is me again..
You go down....
Bro..
Heh, -
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Dont get so excited about it bro , coz what ever kira - u - do , you will fall in the end ..and it doesnt matter ho does it , maybe a new one .. I -Ishida- maybe , and it will be me and I will zot u
BUAHAHAHAHAHA
be well man , later
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Back for a second look. Wow such a sad write, society can be so cruel to others.
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Thank you
I would just like to say thank you for the support and yeah , we sure need to considerate others around us and i am happy you feel the same way i do
ok then , Later
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We never know what another is going though in life. That is why we need to be considerate of others. Excellent write so full of emotion. Good luck in the contest and thanks for entering
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i like it actually. crude unrefined biting with raw emotion. yeah. it's good. the whole gist of the poem. so very true. it's always easier to block out the bad right? just push it down into nothingness. well eitherway that's what we seem to do correct.
good luck!
~lostelvenchild
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