I keep thinking about that day
when you said that
my dimples were the
place-holders for your lips
& we giggled together
in a booth at Waffle House
about the way clove cigarettes
always smell like
Christmas at your sister’s apartment;
&& I’m constantly reminded of how magical last summer felt;
Author notes
DrunktankLullaby
&& I have no idea. seriously. DQ if you please, it won't offend me. [I'm not much for short pieces either, but I couldn't make myself add to this. It had what it needed without my embelishments.]
A contest entry
- Shooting Stars and Eyelashes by bird-mad girl.
1000 points, ended September 10, 2007, 18 entries
Honorable mention
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Summer Fun by misticmoonlite.
1050 points, ended August 10, 2007, 18 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - One to Fifteen by katie-jo.
450 points, ended August 14, 2007, 6 entries
Honorable mention
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
hmm. okay.
Comments
1 - 12 of 12
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nice
a very heartfelt poem, missing the summer before and wishing it could be like that again.. i should know, my boyfriend and i have hit some hard times due to money and family issues, and i so wish we could go back in time and relive those moments which will stay with me forever. a beautiful poem, good luck in the contest.
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sweet and simple
This is a very lovely poem, and it's nice that you don't need to embellish it, because it is perfect the way you wrote it. I like the way you said that you keep thinking about that memory, like you can't get it out of your head. Great write. Thanks for entering and good luck in the contest. -
short and sweet
very nice,I too like short versions, as well as long if I can hold my attention to the subjects,thank you for sharing in our contest...good luck...PM
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no way am I going to DQ this. I'm glad that you didn't add anymore, you said so much in only ten lines! something about this piece made me think about The Truth about Forever. I don't... some similarities.
like your title says, this piece is STUNNING!
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Sarah Dessen is my idol. I've met her twice, actually.
So you seriously just made me have an involuntary response of "umph." in the most amazing way.
best compliment I could ever receieveeee.
thank you SO much!
ohoh and I'm DrunktankLullaby noww... haha.
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you tie unique and random thoughts together with such simplistic perfection. i effin love it.
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godd you're making my night!
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that last line, really brought it all together, and im deffinately diggin this poem....because i know how you feel. this was well written.
=]
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thank you darling! & thanks for the applause as well ♥
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this is cute.
really cute. and I can totally relate to it. -
i think this is the perfect length for this poem. i love short poems actually. and waffle house just like brought a million memories to me.
i can relate to this somuch right now.
brillant isn't even the word for this.
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god, i know right?
waffle house holds more memories than ANY place or thing EVER for me. srsly.
thank you for the love, as always ♥
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