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who knew a memory could be so [stunning?]

I keep thinking about that day
when you said that
my dimples were the
place-holders for your lips
& we giggled together
in a booth at Waffle House
about the way clove cigarettes
always smell like
Christmas at your sister’s apartment;



&& I’m constantly reminded of how magical last summer felt;


Author notes

DrunktankLullaby
&& I have no idea. seriously. DQ if you please, it won't offend me. [I'm not much for short pieces either, but I couldn't make myself add to this. It had what it needed without my embelishments.]

A contest entry

hmm. okay.

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Comments

1 - 12 of 12

  • GiveMeTheGun
    August 22, 2007

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    nice

    a very heartfelt poem, missing the summer before and wishing it could be like that again.. i should know, my boyfriend and i have hit some hard times due to money and family issues, and i so wish we could go back in time and relive those moments which will stay with me forever. a beautiful poem, good luck in the contest.


  • katie-jo
    August 8, 2007

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    sweet and simple

    This is a very lovely poem, and it's nice that you don't need to embellish it, because it is perfect the way you wrote it. I like the way you said that you keep thinking about that memory, like you can't get it out of your head. Great write. Thanks for entering and good luck in the contest.


  • misticmoonlite gold member
    August 8, 2007

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    short and sweet

    very nice,I too like short versions, as well as long if I can hold my attention to the subjects,thank you for sharing in our contest...good luck...PM


  • bird-mad girl
    August 4, 2007

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    no way am I going to DQ this. I'm glad that you didn't add anymore, you said so much in only ten lines! something about this piece made me think about The Truth about Forever. I don't... some similarities.

    like your title says, this piece is STUNNING!


    • DrunktankLullaby
      August 4, 2007
      Edit | Reply
      Sarah Dessen is my idol. I've met her twice, actually.
      So you seriously just made me have an involuntary response of "umph." in the most amazing way.
      best compliment I could ever receieveeee.
      thank you SO much!
      ohoh and I'm DrunktankLullaby noww... haha.


  • solarjinx
    August 3, 2007
    Edit | Reply
    you tie unique and random thoughts together with such simplistic perfection. i effin love it.


  • Anothercheapheart
    August 2, 2007

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    that last line, really brought it all together, and im deffinately diggin this poem....because i know how you feel. this was well written.
    =]


  • Miss Faith
    August 2, 2007

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    this is cute.

    really cute. and I can totally relate to it.


  • Dancing Marionette
    August 1, 2007

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    i think this is the perfect length for this poem. i love short poems actually. and waffle house just like brought a million memories to me.
    i can relate to this somuch right now.
    brillant isn't even the word for this.

    • DrunktankLullaby
      August 2, 2007
      Edit | Reply
      god, i know right?
      waffle house holds more memories than ANY place or thing EVER for me. srsly.
      thank you for the love, as always ♥

1 - 12 of 12