Society celebrates conformity
no matter how much
outcry persists.
Ultimately unable
to comply
to expectations
of straight jackets,
essence becomes lost
and hollow.
The human animal
caged
in civlization's zoo,
we are caught
on the mouse wheel
of the neglected;
mindless.
Encouraged
to assimilate
with rewards
of stature,
we are still
incarcerated
in a corral of
life's confinement,
slithering within
the confines
of a hollow prison.
Author notes
PROMPT - Sliding to the floor of this cage.
A contest entry
- Titles and Lines-Pick One... by Lady Disdain.
500 points, ended August 17, 2007, 9 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
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nicce re-write of the line! very well written, powerful voice. Good Luck!
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Powerful images pervade this piece. Great alliteration.
"slithering within
the confines
of a hollow prison." gives me shivers.
Well penned!


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This is great Gaylene. Your words are quite thought provoking. Great use of unique metaphors. Even when you use a standard type metaphor (mouse wheel) you add something original to it:
on the mouse wheel
of the neglected;
mindless.
I think that are some of my favorite lines. I like the caged animal/ pet animal imagery. It really brings a sense of being both trapped and scrutinized. Very well done!


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a wonderful write which really uses the prompt well. i love the descriptive words and the emotions and imagery. wel done and best of luck







