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Two can play this game

Every-time you break my heart
And make me feel like a tart
I feel like taking a knife
Stabbing you
Watching you bleed
Stabbing you some more
And twisting the blade in your flesh

It would excite me to see you hurt
So you know how you make me feel
And when your eyeballs pop out in distress
And no voice can be heard from you
Then, I will gloat


Or will I?

No

Every-time you break my heart

And make me feel like a tart
I will apologize and buy you a gift
I will be your pretty submissive doll
I will love you
Pamper you
Love you some more


Then rest assured I can be:
that the knife will go deeper
mince your insides to flimsy pieces
And you shall still bleed some more
Then you might realize:

Two can play this game.

Author notes

option-Unrequited love

A contest entry

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Comments

1 - 8 of 8

  • Puking Faerie Dust gold member
    December 29, 2007

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    This isn't really what I was looking for with that option. This is more of an angry, serial-killer type poem I like those every once in a while, but not for unrequited love.
    Thanks for trying though.
    Jeanette*~

  • paradoxical wish
    September 18, 2007

    Edit | Reply

    Brilliant

    Surely Two can play this game, I played it too, lol

    Excellent write...

    Thnx for entering & best of luck

    GloriousGift
    Heba

  • Blankscreen2222 gold member
    August 16, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    Oh! I really love this one.
    Some fabulous imagery here.

    Beautiful smouldering angst.
    Extremely well done.
    Perfect rhyme and flow.


  • Room without doors silver member
    August 12, 2007

    Edit | Reply

    Outstanding

    This is a poem about revenge, a reaction to being hurt. I thought this was dark. The sense of appearing to forgive, acting in a charming and submissive way when really there is the intention to pay back. Impressive. A thought provoking poem.


  • Uniquely-Scarred gold member
    August 6, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    wow dark true of a lot of wowan wish it wasnt the case i loved this i love the darkness and the end well that was ammense great write

    . Rewarded 4


  • Jonathan ROBIN gold member
    August 6, 2007

    Edit | Reply

    Interesting submission

    The font and background heighten the effect sought in this composition even if one is personally unable to identify completely with the portrayal of the dominate/submit relationship

    One can however appreciate its impact on some people though the game often comes at a price too high to pay and frequently to the detriment of the submissive despite the aura some would like to imagine.

  • YoureNoGoodForMe silver member
    July 31, 2007

    Edit | Reply

    Wow!

    Wow! This is beyond ahmazing=]
    LOVED it!

    "It would excite me to see you hurt
    So you know how you make me feel"

    The best lines in the worlddd. Definitely true.

    "Every-time you break my heart

    And make me feel like a tart
    I will apologize and buy you a gift
    I will be your pretty submissive doll
    I will love you
    Pamper you
    Love you some more"

    Those too. There's definitely alot of emotion in those lines, and it makes the reader [myself] understand the forgivingness in these lines, and how in the first lines you wrote:

    "I feel like taking a knife
    Stabbing you
    Watching you bleed
    Stabbing you some more
    And twisting the blade in your flesh"

    And then after you wrote "I will love you, pamper you, love you some more." Great touch there!
    I also liked how you ended this with the words "Two can play this game."
    Absolutely incredible!


  • storiesuntold gold member
    July 31, 2007
    Edit | Reply

    Interesting reverse sycology

    Interesting view of this and how the mind can reverse pain to affect another
1 - 8 of 8