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Perfect Blue Buildings

Perfect blue buildings

bewilder my mind

Where thoughts get lost

and logic's defined

 

Perfect blue buildings

offer the oblivion of sleep

I'm falling, going under,

slumbers call is oh so deep

 

Perfect blue buildings

grasp my slipping hands

The sweet Siren song

is impossible to stand

 

Perfect blue buildings

are lulling me to sleep

Like sheep to the slaughter

no one hears a peep

 

Perfect blue buildings

has I, myself, and me

And my dying 'n denying

is jus' another empty plea

 

No more calling...

'Cause now I'm free falling

~

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Author notes

Inspiration ~ Perfect Blue Buildings By: Counting Crows.

In a list

A contest entry

Please tell me what you think

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    Comment Suggestion: What is your your first impression?
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Comments

1 - 9 of 9

  • mysticstorm gold member
    October 25, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    Love Counting Crow, interesting take on their work. Last two line threw me off, Tom Petty I am guessing.
    Well written in flow and meter.
    Nicely done!
    Thank you for entering!

  • Virgoan
    September 16, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    The flow is wonderful and the imagery is gorgeous. The whole poem is captivating. Beautiful!

    Thanks so much for sharing and I wish you all the best in the contest. Keep writing fellow poet.

    >>>VIRGOAN


  • CarolDesjarlais silver member
    August 19, 2007
    Edit | Reply
    Wow, interesting take on this. I love Counting Crows, btw.


  • Pain in her eyes
    August 14, 2007
    Edit | Reply
    really good writing, awesome imaginatio


  • Blue Rew silver member
    August 3, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    You give this aesthetic beauty that adds to the overall enjoyment with the artwork & font choice.
    I like the theme chosen also...it combines well with the title. I do have a couple of minor suggestions to help improve the flow:
    "Where thoughts got lost" {change got to get for context purposes}
    "is impossible to stand" to "impossible to withstand"
    for more fluidity. Just my opinion that I hope is taken as it is meant: with only helpfulness in mind.
    Blue


  • Random Goldfish gold member
    July 31, 2007
    Edit | Reply
    This is very interesting...


  • grannyeri gold member
    July 31, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    Do not know the song of which you speak, but did like the lyrical qualities of this poem. Liked the flow and the repetition in each verse.


  • Uniquely-Scarred
    July 31, 2007
    Edit | Reply
    love the title of this and you used rhymn verry well indeed good job best of luck in the contest


  • VirginiaDarling
    July 31, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    I think this was an amazeing view of blue buildings, it also came together very well with the picture..I liked every line, it rhymed so well...you have a great use of words and feeling in the write..keep up the great work and good luck in the contest.

1 - 9 of 9