Expectations fulfilled in a whoosh,
first cry resounds the walls,
tears of joy flow, mingle,
wriggling body clasped to chest,
you have blown me away.
A contest entry
- Pay It Forward (PIF) by poetryality.
525 points, ended August 1, 2007, 12 entries
Silver trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 6 of 6
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I love the headlong momentum of this poem, so
delicately balanced, informed by a world of possibility (and uncertainty)where each line piles on a vivid catalogue of the joys of birth. Powerful, yet wonderfully poignant. The birth of a child depicted in the dramatic monologue should light a spark in each and every one of us.
Congratulations on the silver trophy.
May the Warm Winds of Heaven
Blow softly upon your house...
~ crisstiena ♦
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Thank You
Thank you so much crisstiena for your comments on my poem, I do appreciate that you took the time to do so.
~Katie~
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Ah! Yes! I have been blown away four times. I know every line written here. This is a wonderful presentation of the gift of childbirth. I love the "whoosh" in the first line. Excellent entry. Good use of prompt and the 24 word rule.
Thank you for this entry and the best of luck in the contest.
Much LOVE ♥
Renee
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waw and waw! I still do remember...I really do. A moment in time and for life. With only few lines you captured life. Perfect!
~Sonja~
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Well my dear friend you have certainly captured this brilliantly. The miracle of birth and you put it so well. Good luck in the contest ....mal
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Amazement personified
This is a wonderful expresion of blessing. the meaning perfection and eaisly understood, the flow rich and full words few but choosen and used wonderfully. Great Job.
*Go with God* my friend,
Valerie
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