>>what a sick tale i have to tell<<
my lipstick on your collar was only a perk;
you said you l♥ved the color on me
but i only wore it for my Dirty Little Secret [what was his name again?]
&that it always was my favorite shade;
Masochistic Maroon.
our "relationship" was my favourite type of game [you never called my bluff]
i played you better than a hand of Poker;
I could ~smell~ the stale scent of that SLUT on your skin
&now that I've got my tongue down another boy's throat
(where the fxck are you?)
you call me a *dirty whore* [babe, I call it revenge];
but now I have that boy's hands claiming my [heaving] body;
cry, cry, cry [sweetie] you were my arrogant little toy;
i want to hear you scream that overrated cliche [I♥you]
just one more time before you lick her... *gasp!* again.
[i'm on top of him in the back seat, where are you?]
my moans of "I love you" made you oh-so sure
but while you rode her like a roller coaster [up&down]
I was in a bathroom.stall [half-naked and in good company, bby]
listening to my secret boy moan for me; "don't stop!!"
{how much can i take? [1 or 2 fingers inside the four pink walls]
&their not being inserted into our throats.}
there was something i wanted to tell you...
i guess i faked every worthless moment [oops!];
pop that doll && don't forget to take your bitter pills
.*bang bang* motherfxcker.
with these band-aids on my lips&these X's on my wrists
i've become someone else's Bathroom-Stall Barbie Doll.
Author notes
this is written from the opposite p.o.v. its actually about my ex boyfriend, but i changed it so i was the one playing instead of getting played.
dedicated to: patrick.
xobangbangbby
A contest entry
- ::got.a.body.like.an.hourglass:: by rawrbby.
900 points, ended August 11, 2007, 10 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Calling All Dirty Pretty Dollies- I Need An Ap Family by Heartbeatsxfading.
300 points, ended August 2, 2007, 14 entries
Bronze trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Damned To Love You by GypsyEyes.
300 points, ended April 9, 2008, 41 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Sweetie, This Is What Broken Looks Like. by Heartbeatsxfading.
600 points, ended May 20, 2008, 39 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
be honest.
Comments
1 - 24 of 24
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whoaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa. I LOVE THIS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
i love every line, every word. this is pure genius. nice write!!!
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I fucking love this :]
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Harsh. But i approve, revenge is the sweetest thing. I love this write, it actually brought a smile to my face and that hasn't happened in such a long time. So thank you for that and this wonderful poem.
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Love it. Harsh, gritty, emotional, vengeful, perfect. Lots of anger here, and well written!!!
"pop that doll && don't forget to take your bitter pills
.*bang bang* motherfxcker.
with these band-aids on my lips&these X's on my wrists
i've become someone else's Bathroom-Stall Barbie Doll."
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Fucking beautiful.
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Darling, you already know I think this is amazing.
It was faced paced and neevr lost a second of emtion;
this was also exactly what I was looking for paige! -
hahahahahaa! this is great! revenge! dont we all know that well! he had it coming to him most likely! good for you! great poem! thank you so much for entering my contest and i wish you the best of luck! NineTailedFox
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fucking amazing. a;slkfj;salkf
<33
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absolutely lovely. and so real. great piece.
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Somewhat cliche, but very realistic;; revenge, so sweet... but it wasn't revenge, it's even... both having your own little rendevouz in the back seat and one somewhere else [entirely]. So it's all the same and it's something for revenge I'd possibly do... But he would be exacting revenge [I am apparently the dirty little nothing, but he doesn't see it]. Ah well, too late for happily ever afters, I suppose?
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so I loved it, I'm not sure i really understood every word of it, but I think I got the overall picture andn it was good.
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So yeah. I love this. I think the punctuation actually adds to it, instead of distracting it...it makes is so Dirty Pretty. Love this, like ohmygod. bookmaking this. forreal. great job : ]
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iloveyou.
that was amazing.
we should....i dunno....get married? =]
you. go now, and enter my contest. just write me a story, and make it tragic and gorgeous....as always.
♥
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Omfg. Is it okay if i print this out && stick on my bedroom wall? Thisis such an amazing write.
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haha yeah thats fine. yay for me!
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thi si amazing...but dear god the punctuation is distracting...i know thats only my opinion thoguh and that aload of people love it so ignore me....heyhey maybe dp writes should have two versions...the real one [like here] and the version for people who don't like the punctuation...ok lame idea but never mind.
anyway moving off the full stop issues i love this poem, and yes indeed 'gotta love the lifestyle....'
take care keep writing you're amazing...xxx
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Fucking Amazing
I could |.smell.| the stale scent of that.slut on your skin
&& now that I've got my tongue down another boy's throat
(where the *fuck* are you?)
You call me a *dirty whore* [babe, I call it revenge];
but now I have that boy's >hands< claiming my [heaving] body;
cry;; cry;; cry [sweetie] you were my arrogant little toy;
I want to hear you ^scream^ that overrated cliche [I♥you]
just one more time b.e.f.o.r.e you lick her... *gasp!* again.
[I'm on top of him in the back seat.]
omg doll
this was like whooa
i loooved it
srsly
you should definatly win the contests you're in
srsly
you're sooo good at writing like this
i envy you soooo bad
:]
♥
Brandee -
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aww well thank you! you're such a sweetie!
♥
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ha! beautiful!!!
you're not average
more like, ABOVE average! =]] -
ohhhhhh my goodness.
oh my word.
oh my HOLY SHIT.
this was amazing.
[maybe a little over punctuated for my tastes?]
but fucking amazing, nonetheless.
"I played you better than a -hand- of Poker;
I could |.smell.| the stale scent of that.slut on your skin
&& now that I've got my tongue down another boy's throat
(where the *fuck* are you?)
You called me a *dirty whore* [babe, I call it revenge];"
&
"whispers of "I love you" made you oh-so sure
but while you r'o'd'e her like a roller coaster [up && down]
I was in a >bathroom..stall< [half-naked and in good company, baby]"
those bits were seriously stunning. & I adored the entire last stanza, as well.
great freaking job. -
you fucking *AMAZE* me, not amazing me you knew what I meant.
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\\*bang bang* motherfucker//
yay you fucking amazing me. i loved every single word in this poem... wowwww!♥♥♥ such a gorgeous write thank you for entering darling
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wunderfully amazingily awesome! ♥♥♥
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thx!
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