Her cheeks grow rosy,
her fingers numb,
she does not care,
when the wind whispers come.
She cluches a single rose to her face,
her cold blue eyes cry clear tears,
for all she wants is her love near,
but he is no more and she is left,
with an extinguished fire,
cloudy skies and silent summers.
There will be no sun to brighten her day,
no orange glow to stop the decay,
of her beaten broken heart.
A contest entry
- Colour of the Wind by SeaWithYourHeart.
600 points, ended July 31, 2007, 14 entries
Honorable mention
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
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You captured what sorrow comes with the lost of someone you love. Loved the ending...
"There will be no sun to brighten her day,
no orange glow to stop the decay,
of her beaten broken heart."
Congrats on the Honorable
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Flip me this is fantastic this is what i call an amazing poem heart wrenching good begginning rhyme scheme and a punch line ending that leaves a fantastic wow feeling.
you still need to sor out your format though. there are random line numbers of 4 then 6 then 3 try and keep it all the same. but the words were fantastic well done your talent is outstanding : -
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Thank you
I found this comment really helpful. I will do my best in the improve my format in my next group of writes. Cheers xx =-)
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