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. Joyless .. Rictameter Form.




.

Did you,
see the drops sing
across my lips and down,
my wringing stressed out handy work.
Work that consumed my many days and months.
The tear falls down to the wood work,
and soaks into the rift.
Who crushed my dream?
Did you?

.


A contest entry

Please tell me what you think

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    Comment Suggestion: What is your your first impression?
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Comments

  • Seeking Peace silver member
    August 21, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    This is a grand piece, well done on a perfect rictameter, I loved every word and the seamless flow

    Thank you for taking the time to enter this contest, I wish you the best of luck

    Karen


  • whispernthedark Greeters member
    August 11, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    Perfect write. This is one of the best I've read in this contest, I'm certain you'll place. Best of luck in the contest.

    ♥
    whisper


  • The Reapers Angel
    July 29, 2007

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    WOW, this is awesome!
    Dang, your gonna win, most people don't get it can be anything that is two syllables.
    GREAT job on this, a wonderful read!


  • no win no fee
    July 29, 2007
    Edit | Reply
    only 12 and writes so beautifully. Good luck in the contest