You who betrayed me and left me alone
Has your heart turned to stone?
I trusted you and I shared my secrets and life
Yet you carelessly cut my heart with a knife
You'll never know the gashes you've inflicted on my heart
I use the blood as paint for my mind's canvas to creat art
The battle between my emotions have yet to be won
The clash of hatred and love has begun
I hate you every day beacuse you threw me away
And I miss you at night because you're not by my side
I cry for weeks because the agony just keeps growing
And my heart's blood won't stop flowing
I know I need to stitch up my wounds
But those cuts are all that's left of you
I keep hoping that you'll come back with a needle and thread
And for the first time in a while,
I'll have someone beside me when I go to bed
I pray you might hear my plea or my cries of pain
Why do you not care that I'm going insane
I'm sick of this ache in my heart that I live with day to day
I wake up to a world tainted and gray
Does this not bother you that hell is all I know because of you
Do you not have any shame in what you do?
I struggle to keep the battle at bay
But you still haunt my mind everday
You use to hold my collapsed body when I cried
I used to think that i would not be alone when I died
You've torn the happiness out of me
And slowly, with great agony, the life is leaving too
I wonder if you know that when I die I'm thinking of you
Please, just know that I still love you
But my hate still boils like a witch's brew
And my heart still bleeds as I wait for you to show up with your needle and thread
A contest entry
- ♥~/~My Secret Animosity~/~♥ by DevinCora.
450 points, ended July 31, 2007, 7 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - ~Anything Goes~ by Charley-.
425 points, ended April 12, 2008, 125 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Confliction by BlankSillhouette.
600 points, ended March 5, 2008, 43 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Pain by confusionismylife.
300 points, ended March 14, 2008, 29 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - ~♥~ Hopeless Romantics and Other Sad Love Poems ~♥~ by Shassidy.
525 points, ended April 21, 2008, 67 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 6 of 6
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This is a great poem! The emotion that comes through on this one comes through really strong. Some of the rhymes seem off, such as lines 5 and 6 and then lines 15-17, and line 28 doesn't have a rhyming line, but overall it is really great. I like how you referred to one of the earlier lines for your finishing line, it worked well to sum the piece up. Great job and good luck in the contest!
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Great job! This was a great display of metaphors, and a very well written poem for the most part. Just a few uncrossed t's or undotted i's here and there...but youve got the foundation of an amazing poem here! Great job again and thank you for entering this is my contest. Best of luck to you.
XBlankSillhouetteX -
Nice work
Hello there and thanks for entering my contest. I like your flow in your piece and your creative side too well thanks again for entering and best of luck!
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ok
Alright this time I had time to reflect on this piece...It is very very good!!! Some parts I thought were just outstanding
"I know I need to stitch up my wounds
But those cuts are all that's left of you"
This line brings tears to my eyes, for I know what its like to feel this way!!! And I absolutly love the emotion that you played on in this!!! Once again I wish you the best of luck in my contest!!!
And very good write!!! -
Most excellent
I very much enjoyed this piece!!!! I cant really say much right now!!! I am kind of busy... but I will try to comment again later!!!
Good luck in my contest!!! -
beautiful....exactly what Im goin threw and would love to put into context for my ex!! Great!
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