Tired of malls and other stores
I went shopping in the sky
Not so crowded but no parking
is the rule if you can fly
I flew right through two clouds for sale
far too large and much too pale
A wind I thought would be quite nice
the one I bought was cold as ice
Over penguins soon we blew
Eskimos and icebergs too
Atop this big world’s updownsides
I learned that I could not reside
Then like my friend the honking goose
I bid au revoir to snow and moose
I headed for the parallel
between the poles to fires of hell
“Florida, from high above
seems small below” said my pal dove
“This is the place, my Shangri-la”
but as I spoke a roar went by
there somewhere in the darkening sky
a rocket sailing caught my eye
so as it passed I hitched the draft
I was but rat upon a raft
vamoosing without cry or path
The Moon the stars and back to Mars
from whence forth many claim I came
for I always played a different game
And looking down at round and blue
Again I begin to pity you
A contest entry
- Let's Go Fly a Kite! by Zephyr Aryn.
600 points, ended August 9, 2007, 9 entries
Gold trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Next Stop, Outer Space! by mwilson50.
600 points, ended February 7, 2008, 5 entries
Bronze trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Show me your current emotion by Lady Michaella.
392 points, ended July 13, 2008, 10 entries
Honorable mention
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - a cloud by james119.
600 points, ended July 28, 2008, 20 entries
Honorable mention
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Goodbye and Goodluck by Georgia La Mariposa.
400 points, ended October 22, 2008, 9 entries
Honorable mention
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 14 of 14
-
This is a great write...
I prefer something written fresh...especially for a picture prompt...but if it fits...it's a good thing! lol
Best wishes in the contest and always!
Write on and on...



-
Congratulations Bill on all your awards

This write had an upbeat way about it
And I enjoyed the ride thanks for joining in
Warm thoughts.
Frozentearz -
Yay!
What a fun, fantastical vision you've created here! Well done! Thanks for playing along!! -
Let me know who you are
thanks for the poem
x
-
kudos
wow! i really liked this one! it showed fantastic emotion, had great flow, and was just a really neat little poem! i enjoyed reading it so much! thanks for entering! good luck! -
Really liked the opening of this and the rejection of conventional distractions. An interesting and imaginative write, I found myself joining you on your journey. Nice write and thanks for entering. Good luck in my contest.
-
great flight of fancy

The Cape Canaveral allusion is a very interesting departure. I enjoyed it. -
Thanks for entering!!!!! Great job! I'm guessing the emotion here is happy or crazy? Or flying lol.
-
Good one
This was enjoyable to read, and flowed. I like the ending especially. Started touring the Earth, then hitched a ride to go even higher, further. Thanks for entering this! -
Cool!
Has a very fun air to it. No pun intended. ^_^ Great write.
Good luck in the contest,
-Dlvvanzor -
congrats
-
I just realised something that doesn't make sense...that is, if you think of it in literal terms:
"Over penguins soon we blew
Eskimos and icebergs too
Atop this big world’s upperside"
Penguins are from the SOUTH pole. Polar bears are from the north. I'll let it slide a little, though, because you probably used it to help with the meter. -
Very interesting take on the prompt. Personifying a kite took me on quite a wild ride. Keep on writing!
-
Great Poem!!!
Well Bill, your rhyme was so great and this was such a pleasure to read. Nice journey that your words took us on. To be one among the clouds and go where we chose. Sounds like a nice childhood dream that never left your thoughts my friend. We all keep a few tucked away. Thanks for sharing.You take care, Sandy

1 - 14 of 14














