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My Alter Ego

Missing image

 

 

Locked inside

                     unleashed,

reflections reveal as

alter ego

feasts fevorishly

on

    unfathomed,

                       unspeakable,

silenced screams

of

second self.

                    Soul sister

appetizes on

tainted attitude

                       from twins' torment.

Devouring devilishly on

                         delicious desires,

              acts untouched

by her double deity.

Courageously displaying

                                companions cries

 

for all to see...

 

 

 

 

Author notes

for my AE....

A contest entry

Tell me..do I do Dark, My Pretty???

    : , Your review:

    Comment Suggestion: What is your your first impression?
    • Line numbers  • Invite them to read
    : no Cost: 0 free left 0 points, You have (?)

Comments

1 - 30 of 30

  • soldiersoul gold member
    November 11, 2007
    Edit | Reply
    i can relate


  • ClassixGrace
    August 10, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    Very thought provoking I should say. I quite didn't understand this but i shall reread it again. Okay now i understand of your ego wanting a companiion nice deep


  • Griswold silver member
    August 7, 2007
    Edit | Reply
    Awesome poem hon, well deserved Gold...Scott


  • Naridill
    August 7, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    This is brilliant, and with that, adding to the flavour, the person whose comment is first on this poem, he is blocking me and I have no idea why but that is a double inspiration.


  • Jonathan ROBIN
    August 6, 2007

    Edit | Reply

    Promise...sing

    Interesting alliteration and potential despite possible areas of reformulation which could perhaps enhance the argument.

    Locked inside
    unleashed,
    reflections reveal as
    alter ego ./.


    for reflections reveal should this read revealed ?

    One might have the temerity to suggest
    Locked inside,
    unleashed,
    reflections revealed
    as alter ego ./.

    for
    Devouring devilishly on
    delicious desires,

    one may feast ON Whoochi but one dispenses with ON when devouring her

    companions cries

    should read either companion cries or companion's cries ??

    Hoping this comment is construed as constructive criticism ...


  • Jeremy0826 silver member
    August 4, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    Great job with this!
    I love the way that you brought that
    picture to life and your format here
    as well. Congratulations on your trophy
    my friend! Keep up the wonderful work
    here!




    Jeremy0826


  • Floorboards
    August 4, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    crikey, dark, deep and quite sinister I feel, deserved more than the hm you were awarded sis, great stuff again.
    You continue to impress me,
    Bro'.


  • Swan song gold member
    August 4, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    This poem should have gotten gold in my opinion
    you are hitting the ball out of the park her my dear. Excellent.


  • Uniquely-Scarred
    August 3, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    fantastic my friend your best yet i love this, maybe cause i can be a little egocentric ) : lol but this was a grea write, inviting the reader inside.

    great write great poet.

  • Aurora Ceres
    August 1, 2007
    Edit | Reply
    OOOO! Hell yes you do dark! Creepy pic, right up your alley! This is awesome, you've got alliteration going on....and the sentiments your words carry are powerful. We all need to pay a lil tribute to our alter egos. Excellent, again!

    Bella


  • February Moon gold member
    July 31, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    Amazing. I am in total awe here. You have great poetic talent. Thank you for entering, and good luck to you.
    Chelsea


  • Daoine
    July 30, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    Do not be afraid of yourself.
    You have it in you to love all of you,
    even your darkest nature.

    Blessings


  • Dalaney gold member
    July 28, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    first of all....this photo is crazy! lol
    but what follows is remarkable, and oh,
    so true...I think you have a winner on
    your hands with this entry, my friend.

    Love, Lane


  • Soulful Woman silver member
    July 28, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    I knew you were crazy enough to have another person inside you..LOL This was a great piece...Content and flow were awesome..Now, is this you or her??? Great job BB..
    Love ya lots


  • aliceramone
    July 27, 2007
    Edit | Reply
    a good tribute to your ae .lol...great flow and alliteration to this piece,well done


  • blueyez
    July 27, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    wow it's like if you were a Gemini !!!!!
    I love your writes sweets!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
    Peace and Love


  • Anfractuous
    July 26, 2007
    Edit | Reply
    Emotional....Nice...I liked it quite a bit. ^.>^


  • Amera gold member
    July 26, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    Wow! this is powerful, fast hard hitting almost like a rant. Are you pissed at your self? Jump in the bath tub with me, you'll feel better.

    Love,
    Amera ♥


  • soulfultia gold member
    July 26, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    Headed straight for the Gold I see, you have done a wonderful job on this, as always your unique structure guides us on a stunning read! ~Tia


  • JeannieD Hunter gold member
    July 26, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    Wow, you thoughts are deep girl. An amazing and powerful write. Very descriptive alliteration. Best of luck in the contest.

    Jeannie


  • RedAquarius
    July 26, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    The alliterative touch in here is nicely executed and not overdone. Great imagery and I just really dug the whole presentation, flow and emotional tone. Good write!


  • astralshepherd gold member
    July 26, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    if this poem does not bring out the muse in the contest holder, i do not know what would. for my part i am beginning to unravel with the reading of it, as if so other worldly creature is doing a Sigorny Weaver Alien eruption in my chest. I guess, AE, Alter Ego, could just as easily be Alien Eruption. This poem reads too much like life for me...as if the poem could be about me (in some dark alley kindofway) If this does not garner gold, i will be greatly disappointed. Blessings and best wishes, ~r.


  • blpwolf
    July 26, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    dark, deep and for all to see....wow....nice..and very well written...wow..ahem I did already say that didn't I...I love this one..

  • Mercury Rising
    July 26, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    Great alliteration and a very original take on the picture prompt. Best of luck in the contest with this excellent piece of dark poetry.

    David


  • Heavenly Angel silver member
    July 26, 2007
    Edit | Reply
    Nicely done, Julie


  • rite
    July 26, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    Trapped inside the flesh known to the world by our name are two egos who never agree. One may tell us to slit throats while the other urges to flood those we meet with love. We are sinister sweethearts, running in death squads with a kind heart. You have addressed the contest assignment accurately with a splendid poem. Good luck in the contest. Take care,

    U


  • Random Goldfish gold member
    July 26, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    Oh, first off that's a wonderful picture...now...
    Now, this is just dark...!
    I love it...the ideas with twins and dieties...ohhh...spooky goodness!

  • liveheart
    July 26, 2007

    Edit | Reply

    mmmm...

    Another excellent write using the pic. I do miss your dark side (LOL)....sorry! Awesome wording and description our conflicted humanism. MUCH LOVE,H.


  • Snow White Sorrow
    July 26, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    I like the unusual layout, and the imagery is amazing. I especially like the line "Soul sister appetizes on tainted attitude from twins' torment." Well done!


  • Cerulean Sunrise gold member
    July 26, 2007
    Edit | Reply
    Yummy tribute, my strawberry poptart
    I loves the alliteration.

1 - 30 of 30