Ditch the ads, upload images and much more - upgrade today from 5.95/month!
Read Contests Groups Learn Forums Store Help
 

The Old Contemptibles



Near soldiers stacking cartridges, where once swordsmith tempered blade,
where embattled ancient ensign, all emblazoned, might have played,
pale pink and purple pennant flopped and fluttered, half afraid.
Artillery, light infantry, - no cavalry now neighed, -
no green serene but khaki drab, no trees to lend their shade,
no calm was found save hole profound, - instead of silent glade
mounds splattered round, unsafe, unsound, bound bud, mud, man afraid.  

There, mid tattered tent, spent truck, went General and Aide
from spy-hole posts surveyed the hosts who ghosts would soon be made,
strolled towards headquarters, where were grave decisions made
that sealed the fates of officers, despite bright burnished braid,
of sturdy NCO’s, and of the sapper with his spade,
of wordy privates’ cockney wit, their final roll call played.

Kitchener’s ‘King and Country’ campaign, which few sought to evade,
called all of independant spirit who would not be dismayed.
Conscripts later served and fought, each soldier’s thought to home oft strayed,
to Blighty’s sights, their crops or shops, where once they’d love and trade,
to London’s lights, to Piccadilly’s Eros proud displayed.
Flanders’ fights delights would blight, blast cast hope down, scope hell-hole laid.
Few who’d faced fire in the mire on future nights slept unafraid.

As sight shots salvoed over, scarred scared sentries who surveyed,
trenches little rest discovered as shrapnel splinters sprayed
slivered steel, taught lethal lessons to those who’d dared invade.
Tommy couldn’t tip his cap to tinpot tyrant’s cheap tirade,
but brave advanced, life chanced, to, through, sharp barbed wire barricade,
dodging restless rifle bullets which too often ricocheted.


Unrecorded gallantry few chronicles defrayed,
‘known unto God’ anonymous from His story were greyed.
They’d courage of convictions which would neve be betrayed.
Bombs burst beneath lead powder sky, men cursed when shell, grenade,
caused a cross between a thunderstorm and Satan’s serenade,
as secret centres of sad Earth soared skywards in cascade,
shaking quaking caves as caverns quivered under cannonade.

Shells shattered ears, hell shuttered eyes, breath stifled, haunted, life decayed.
Shells scattered tears, fears, cursing cries, Death undaunted, undelayed.
Shells sundered dears, split sacred ties, - widows’ sighs made lonely maid.
Some scouts crept forward silently, as snipers to dissuade
the foe, then fell – no time to tell – the pride of the brigade
though crack, attacked with pack on back, - young lives were vainly paid.
“’Tain’t just luck we lack” said Jack to Jim Jones as he prayed –
but, ambush trapped, none turned back, - scrapped, another ill-planned raid.
Such senseless skirmishes were styled ‘unfortunate escapade’ –
by almoners distressed who through scarred, angry dead would wade.

One corner of encampment parked white marquee marked ‘First Aid’,
in canvas cloth bright scarlet cross upon its stretched top was displayed.
Bearers brought there broken bodies, souls on stretchers limply laid, -
though while privates died, some Generals tried to skip an extra grade !
In battle the guns would rattle, their metal chattered away,
Pom mettle huns would nettle, their fettle settled fray, -
(though far from Tipperary, Irish hearts were seldom swayed).

When Tommy’d said his piece at peace suave politicians played,
a troupe of monkeys muttering, as jaded donkeys brayed.
Versailles’ Peace to end all War was worded, then railwayed
for at Tannenburg von Hindenburg had Russia’s future weighed,
forced Russian bear to beat retreat, till Tsar by bolsheviks was slayed.
Though Trotsky beat his breast at Brest a treaty tough was made,
taking lands but freeing bands who burst Denikin’s last stockade.
Meanwhile hoch Kaiser hid in Holland, treated as a renegade.

Then Churchill's friends created anti-soviet crusade,
with allied armies intervened, whose hand was overplayed.
attempting People to persuade, the communist forbade,
assisting Kolchak’s cossack hordes to harrass, rape and raid.
Red-White's fratricidal fight fresh map of Europe made, -
Finns, Litts, Latts, Czechs, Estonians were into being bade.
New President of Poland upon piano played -
Paderewski striking freedom’s chords on Chopin’s hit parade.

When the ‘Last Great War’ was over, and tidings were relayed,
victory crowns in country, towns, cheers at Palace balustrade,
though many looked on in askance as Lloyd-George was hurrayed
while each bottled brain in Britain bragged how he had steady stayed.
But in the “land of heroes”, though the ranks well earned their accolade,
most must each meal measure while the few in leisure layed.
That some still carved while soldiers starved highlighted masquarade !

./.

Now the uniform that won fair maid is worn, drawn fringes frayed,
as if chip by chip the paint had torn from weather-worn façade.
What hair still peeked from cap that peaked showed streaks of care woe greyed.
Now, replacing fragile faces, poppies answer on parade,
unpining emblems filing in grave memory of brave slayed
lest we forget a sacrifice whose souvenir shan't fade.

 

 

Author notes



robi3_0098_robi3_0000 XXX_DJZ


World War I recruitment poster featuring Lord Kitchener. (Alfred Leete 1882–1933)
http://flickr.com/photos/84345891@N00/3616430/

Old Contemptibles Association 1
http://flickr.com/photos/lwr/199460790/ Leo Reynolds

Old Contemptibles Association 2 http://flickr.com/photos/13430918@N02/1402297684/ Northernhub


The World War I British Expeditionary Force derived its nickname the 'Old Contemptibles' from a supposed 'Order of the Day' for 19 August 1914 issued by Kaiser Wilhelm.

It is my Royal and Imperial Command that you concentrate your energies for the immediate present upon one single purpose, and that is that you address all your skill and all the valour of my soldiers to exterminate first the treacherous English [and] walk over General French's contemptible little army.



http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/British_Expeditionary_Force

In a list

A contest entry

.

    : , Your review:

    Comment Suggestion: What is your your first impression?
    Line numbers  • Invite them to read
    : no Cost: 0 free left 0 points, You have (?)

Comments

1 - 33 of 33
  • NeferMaatNetjer silver member
    October 26
    Edit | Reply
    Bravo, to you sir! Excellent Poem!


  • Jihi-Kami
    October 2

    Edit | Reply

    Wow.

    This is not only a poem with wonderful imagery and flow. It has conconance, assonance, uses cocaphony well, and, above all, strickingly resembles the form and expertise of the poems I have most recently been introduced to through my American Literature and Composition classes. A wonderful write. I can certainly understand of the other awards this piece has obtained!
    Thank you for entering,
    Misty♥


  • crivanea silver member
    September 19

    Edit | Reply
    wow...i knew i'll get in trouble if i allowed PW...and i'm right...a very impressive narrative/poem...well written..epic in both form..style..length..message..story...quite a piece here..and excellent rhyme scheme as well


  • SomeonesToySoldier gold member
    September 1

    Edit | Reply
    Wow I love it I'm partial to rhyme poems and you maintained the same rhyme the entire way through without a hitch or really having to repeat lines or phrases. The rhyme kept the reader there through the long poem which is in itself quite a feet. thank you for entering this poem into my contest. good luck

  • kool

    Kool poem =) , you have a unique style of writing , very interesting piece of poetry and writing but a bit too long . it has a good style of ryhming aswell , i like how all the last words all ryhme the same througout the poem , thanks for entering my contest .
    wonderful k
    byyyyyyyyyye k

  • Whoa!

    I read this and understand what I am reading, goodness the arts of the master writer, did his research well, tought me about other countrys battles and disagreements...thank you for this entry...good luck
    Linda


  • Dryad Enya
    June 22

    Edit | Reply
    Kitchener’s ‘King and Country’ campaign, which few sought to evade,
    called all of independant spirit who would not be dismayed.
    Conscripts later served and fought, each soldier’s thought to home oft strayed,
    to Blighty’s sights, their crops or shops, where once they’d love and trade,
    to London’s lights, to Piccadilly’s Eros proud displayed.
    Flanders’ fights delights would blight, blast cast hope down, scope hell-hole laid.
    Few who’d faced fire in the mire on future nights slept unafraid.

    This stanza is by far the most rewarding what you have written here, in my opinion -which this is about may i say- it's good enough for books and to be read aloud in hundreds of years time when world war 7 is on.

    Braillaint work here so well done you, *worship*

  • WOW.... it is a true experience to read this piece. I felt like i was actually there ducking from fire and seeing everything as it would have really happened. It was a pleasure to read especially when you bring it all home at the end tying it all up so nicely with the lest we forget. This piece was a job well done cant wait to read a few more of your poems in the future.

  • Oh, wow, this is a brilliant write, you have written in great detail, and you really are able to put the reader in that position. You are able to really bring out the emotions and imagery. It has lovely flow and language too Thank you for entering and good luck.

  • snolan
    April 27

    Edit | Reply
    My my my. This is most certaintly an epic poem, in both length, content, and rhyme scheme. I've only seen one or two that rival it in any of those three areas. I can't honestly find anything to criticize other than the fact that it might be improved slightly by the use of capitalized letters. Other than that... its wondeful.


  • rufina caraid gold member
    April 23

    Edit | Reply

    Thank You for the link to this amazing work. I'd be interested to know how long it took you to piece together, from research to this final work we see here.

    I'm so very interested in War Poetry, in particular WW1 and WW2and  I'm truly impressed with what Ive read here. An amazing project from go to whoa. Thanks again.  Von ~ Oldpoetry

    • Dates & Research

      According to my records the first version of around 530 words was written on 23 July 1975 and expanded between 10 12 August 1975 to around 700. Two revisions followed 6 November 2004 at 842 words and 23 May 2008 with some tightening which took the total down to just under 800 words - hoping that answers the question. >90% of my verse posted on AP has been revised at least once

      Little time spent on research as information is considered 'general knowledge'.

  • Great masterpiece here. I would suggest that in line fore that you add a sylable before "...no calvary neighed." If you read it aloud you will see that the flow reads better if you say something like "...no calvary horses neighed."


  • Aedara-Wren silver member
    April 11

    Edit | Reply
    Ah war poetry, I've been reading that for revision all day and it has to be said this is as good at quite a few of them. I recall now that despite saying I didn't want pre-writes I forgot the click the button to say it so I'll let this one by since it is suited so well to the contest and its already here and really rather good. I enjoyed the rythym and flow of it which meant that it was moving without being overbearingly sombre as some war poems are. Good luck in the contest.


  • Legend silver member
    April 7

    Edit | Reply
    I do not think i have ever seen a Mono-rhyme written with such excellence.The poem its self was so intriguing that i barely noticed it. I can not think of just how much work you must have put into it, what ever the amount the final finished piece was well worth it Excellent

  • extremely well formed

    great content and inspirational to read for all military.I for one did not realize the content was factual until i read through the links, thank you for this entry,

    good luck
    mm


  • BabyBun silver member
    February 24
    Edit | Reply
    I enjoyed this entry - extremely well written. Thanks and good luck


  • Exit-Stage-Right
    February 1

    Edit | Reply
    I must've been 25 or so lines into this before I realized it was a monorhyme, theretofore concentrating on the message and enjoying all the internal rhymes. It's a masterpiece in a category all its own and I have to laugh at the current judge (Flyboy) for saying it's too long. If words bore you, take up another hobby besides poetry!


  • LittleMoon silver member
    January 26

    Edit | Reply
    An amazing history lesson in a wonderful write. I never even noticed the length as it held me from start to finish. Soldiers in WW1 had so many enemies to fight, disease, mud, cold, wet, being cannon fodder for some top brass to make names for themselves and go down in history as heroes. So many of them way under aged to even be in uniform, these days would still be school children.
    So many thousands, many "unknown" forever, R.I.P. Sheila


  • Sergeant Awesome
    January 19
    Edit | Reply
    This poem is way too long. But it's good. Good luck in my contest.


  • Amera gold member
    December 30, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    I’m so impressed with this poem and I see why it has won several top trophies. I really don’t recall ever seeing a poem this long and with this much depth penned in monorhyme before. This is truly a masterpiece and the time and effort you spent on it is so evident. Standing ovations and three army bunnys for this!

    Love,
    Amera♥


  • moonbumps silver member
    November 23, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    A mamoth write worthy of the Silver-congratulations to you poet-
    Hilly


  • Cupcrazy gold member
    November 19, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    A brilliant historical piece, I loved the format you chose and the excellent rhythm and rhyme. This piece made me feel like I was there, it has such a captivating effect. Excellent work hun, loved it. Hugs, Bunny


  • Cynthia Gaines gold member
    November 14, 2008

    Edit | Reply

    Brilliant!!

    Awesome imagery, with a personal touch!! Thank you for sharing your heart-and-soul-felt poem with all of us!! Wishing all the best to you, always. Peace, love & hugs, xx Cyn xx


  • dustytiger
    November 11, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    this is amazing, i am not generally a huge fan of prose (it's hard for me to read online, alas) but i am glad i stuck it out to read this fantastic write, best of luck in the contest


  • Broken Vow
    November 9, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    wow. ummmmm....i don't even know what to say! for starters, the subject of the poem is very unique in itself. i like it. one of my favorite line was "mounds spread around, unsafe, unsound, bound mud to man afraid". somehow that spoke to me. good job. on this!


  • Powered by Tofu
    October 18, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    wow. great overwhelming write.
    you've left me speechless.
    good luck with this amazing write.
    xoxo,
    gooshawn<3


  • peregrin
    August 31, 2008
    Edit | Reply
    Wow...
    thank you for entering my contest.


  • Yorkshire Rose
    August 13, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    wow, what a poem, this is an mind blowing poem about ww1, i love the mixture of pictures and words also how you must have an in depth knowledge of ww1 because of your massive use of vocab., you painted an disturbing and real life picture of the trenches, well done thank you for your entry


  • albymyheart gold member
    July 14, 2008

    Edit | Reply

    Extraordinary!

    The skill of a professional writer shows through in this work. You delve into a war scene taking the reader into the trenches with you, ducking from fire. At the same time you expose the irony and futility of war yet without ridicule.

    Your openning line is magic and sets the tone of the piece well. Then the story unfolds in vivid imagery and historic realisim.

    One of my favourite lines is...
    "as secret centres of sad Earth soared skywards in cascade." Such a poetic description of a scene lacking in all poetic ambience.

    77 out of 79 lines all rhymed with the same sound and the other two almost rhymed (away/fray)! I couldn't help being a little dissapointed at those two rhymes when all the rest rhymed to perfection with the (ade/ayed etc) sound.

    You have entered a real masterpiece in my contest, and I thank you for your this extraordinary entry.

    alby


  • daddy joker
    July 8, 2008
    Edit | Reply
    loved ever last word of this wish you the best of luck and thank you for entering


  • BlackSwan
    May 22, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    "mounds spread around, unsafe, unsound, bound mud to man afraid" -This poem is incredible. You should seriously publish it or something. Absolutely incredible.

    The rhyming is ingenious, the stanzas detailed and informative. I feel absorbed into a war like never before. Wonderful imagery and alliteration.

    Spectacular.

    -Thank you for your entry, Angi Terese


  • redmarkonthewall
    October 29, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    Very well done, full of detail and facts, beautiful alliteration! I love alliteration and my friend you did it justice. This was a lengthy bit but I must say it kept me reading and that is a good thing. My favourite part would have to be these three lines:
    "Shells shattered ears and shuttered eyes, breath was haunted, life decayed.
    Shells scattered tears and cursing cries, Death undaunted, undelayed.
    Shells sundered dears and sacred ties, - widows’ sighs and lonely maid."
    Well done!

1 - 33 of 33