So we meet again?
In this lonely room
Its walls bound in ink
Your voice is a gulf
as you cut yourself open
dribbling arogance
at my feet.
Do you think there is some great meaning?
In my refusal to accept
what you say?
Do you there is an ulterior motive
for my denial of your
rigid ways?
Just freedom from your
black and white
constraints.
This towering law of ideas
built on your lofty logic
sways in the breeze
of undenialable inconsistancy.
I used to love you
before I found out
there were holes in your lines.
Falibility in your creation.
Author notes
This is about the subject I chose to study, I still like it, it just isn't what I thought.
Last three line verus - think about it, does it fit?
A contest entry
- Kill love, have fun, and whatever by Anastasiya.
657 points, ended July 26, 2007, 22 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Atleast Try by Envelope.
725 points, ended August 2, 2007, 25 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Give Me Your Best Poem by AshtrayBaby.
2100 points, ended August 22, 2007, 37 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 8 of 8
-
Nice job. I liked this alot. At first I thought you were referring to a person, but then some parts confused me and I realized it wasn't. However, really good stuff
-
I usually don't like poems that ask questions in them but this was really nice. I didn't expect to like it as much as I did. I really didn't.
Well, keep it up and good luck!
-
cries .... deep and utter cries
-
I really like this poem. I don't quite understand it all though *hangs head in shame* But I understand enough to know that it's awesome!
-
good job on this peom i liked it
kayla -
my read through this was inconsistent, i found myself re reading lines to see if i had made the mistake, but this was just a bit too scatter shot in the beginning, and a few times i was confused by what you were trying to say, but it just might be the word placement, so try rereading this to see if everything is how you wanted it
-
-
Hm, I was kind of in the mood not come out and say what I was saying when I wrote this, so I didn't want it to be so clear and logical, which is a bit dumb I concede. But I think I can use your suggestion to try tie the first 2 stanza in with the next ones, there does seem to be a bit of a jump there to me, as I re-read it with your words in mind. Was there any particular part you found didn't seem to fit?
-
-
Oh, this is sad. Pretty good write. Thank you for entering and good luck.
Adding your comment:
1 - 8 of 8
