Slicing fruit as if to say she loves me best,
Carefully carving apples in shapes of moon,
Throwing peel aside in pile with all the rest,
Recalling wisps of dreams in yesterday's June,
She stops a while, just to look into my eyes,
Like she could play with youth there all afternoon.
Forming moons in spiraled mounds, in crusts of pie
She designs sugared sculpture with spiced skill, and
Bakes in heat of wait as kitchen timer flies.
She transfers love's work of art to plate from pan
And tells me, "Seize your joy, dear, while you still can."
In a list
A contest entry
- One Tough Challenge - Invite Only by trista.
600 points, ended August 4, 2007, 5 entries
Gold trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
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Wow, another very creative approach to the prompt! I love the descriptions you've used, which form a clear picture in my mind as I read. The rhyme is beautifully done and true to the form. My only suggestion is to double check the syllable count in L5, as I only come up with 10. I especially loved the last line of this, though "Like she could play with youth there all afternoon." struck me quite hard also. (In a good way, of course.
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Thank you so much for entering and good luck to you. I'm so pleased that all the judges met this challenge!
Best wishes,
~J.
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Awwww. I loved the rhyming and the qoute in the final line of the last stanza. Beautiful job TTC. Loved it
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