Wind whistles by in the night
playing at her rain soaked hair
she sits on the edge of a rotting deck
the sea billows and crashes beneath her bare feet
the dread in her eyes in unmistakable
Her life drains by like the last drops of rain falling from the night sky
He disowned her, he ignored her
Why did he leave her in such dread?
Now she wishes she were dead
a tear rolls down her made-up face
smearing her tan foundation and creating a streak of back eye-liner
Oh how she yearns for his sweet embrace
no love before had she ever felt
his was the first the only and she was sure the last
what but sorrow awaits her now?
her dreams are shattered the shards have pierced
there is no repairing the damage done she still fears
But on the horizon the seas calm
the winds die down and the moon rises up
a warm hand gently touches her shoulder and lifts back her hair
she gazes up into the face of her loved one smiling down at her
he says he is sorry and he loves her more then she knows
he says I missed you at the prom why did you leave?
her reply comes through cold lips “She was there you took her arm
and together you danced; she was radiant in gold and I in a brown and blue dress,
I felt inferior I felt put out and then your love I did doubt”
“But love” he says with a whisper so sweet
“She was shallow and ugly inside, you dear are kind
You are the most beautiful woman there in my eyes”
And they kissed a kiss so sweet and pure
they knew now what they had come there for
And that was simply to love each one all the more and so they stood out on the deck
The dances inside the ladies in dress
The music soft for loved ones there
Her hair was damp her dress had tore
But the most beautiful couple that night was out of the spot light
and dancing in the soft moon beams and light rain on the deck
She knew that no matter who was there, she was the real Prom Queen.
Author notes
This is dedicated to my secret love, I will not tell his real name so I will address him as Blue eyes. I love you Blue eyes! ♥ forever.
Contests -
*Lover I Dont Have To Love #6*
*Option 3 broken love then re-gained love*
*tinyalien13 - option 1 *
A contest entry
- Proposals From The Heart. by Poetryintheblood.
350 points, ended July 29, 2007, 11 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - For Poets With Less Then Five Trophies by Starz of Heaven.
525 points, ended July 25, 2007, 16 entries
Honorable mention
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - give me your favourites (prewrites allowed). by aeolia.
500 points, ended July 29, 2007, 57 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - *L.o.s.t, H.u.r.t.&&C.o.n.f.u.s.e.d* by Logans-Mommy.
500 points, ended August 2, 2007, 49 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - So You Think You Can Write? by KP 2 Reborn.
1400 points, ended July 30, 2007, 25 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - && I Promise I Sparkle In The .Dark. [I shine brighter than the *stars*] by PaintedParisPassion.
775 points, ended August 5, 2007, 25 entries
Honorable mention
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Take your pick... by tinyalien13.
300 points, ended July 31, 2007, 11 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Broken Love/Found Love by DeepinRage.
300 points, ended August 8, 2007, 21 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 19 of 19
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Wow! Your work has matured a lot since I last stopped by your page! The imagery of this was excellent, and I really enjoyed the story behind your words. Nice use of dialogue too, the relationship between your two characters was beautiful. Very well done and all the best,
KP -
Very nice poem. I loved it. It was very well written.
I'm guessing that he was the Prom King and the girl that he was dancing with when she (the girl in the blue and brown dress) left was the Prom Queen.
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Very nice and straight forward...I admire your talents!
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very good write. i can feel the emotion coming from the words. lovek the word choice. good luck
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This gave me a tingly feeling down my spine and brought a smile to my face. Very few writes have been able to do that. I loved the happy ending in this story. Good luck in the contest
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Very good
First off,
You followed the rules.
That makes me happy, thank you.
Secondly,
This was such a beautiful and sweet write
Im glad you entered it.
Its too bad that not many guys out there in the world are like this.
You are very lucky to have experienced this, if you did.
I hope you experience wonderful and true love with your 'blue eyes'
Thanks for entering.
Good Luck.
Keep Writing.
:]
♥
PaintedParisPassion -
The story here has such poignancy and truth - I guess we have all been there and done that. The whole piece is a great metaphor for life. Some editing would improve this immensely;for example "in unmistakable" surely should read "is unmistakable"? A nice read, thank you.
Donald -
Very Nice!!!
Great flow - Best of luck to you in this contest!!! Peace and love, Cyn 
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I must say this was an entertaining romantic story. In so many ways I could relate this to someone I know. I loved it, it kept me wanting to resd more. Also very cute. It made me feel (not in a gross way) like I could feel what the girl was feeling even though I'm a guy. Thats what makes it so authentic. Great Job!
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This was quite good. I loved the imagery, it was so engaging, I really began to feel for this girl in your poem. The words were truthful, and it seems very real and heartfelt. I liked this very much, I liked the first few lines, and the last few the best. I felt they were the most powerful, because they started and finished this wonderful little story of loosing something, and realizing something equally good. Thanks for entering, KP
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oh its cute, i like it, its a cute story.
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Wonderful
Oh.. this is so beautiful and touching, and above all so well-written, it flows beautifuly!... Congratulations, I loved it.
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This is a very nice write. This person she be honored with a poem like this.Thank you for your entry
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Wonderful poem. I love it. I also love the way you wrote it. Well I'll be sure to read more of your work.
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I loved this poem. I really enjoyed it. You are a very creative writer.
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This is excellent. I am very impressed. The imagery, choice of words... I am stunned into silence. Blue eyes, is very very lucky
Faerie - Siter Greet
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Thank you for your beautiful entry, Josephine
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Yes this is just ;ove;y
The images you have created with your words told such a wonderful story and I could see and feel it all happening in front of me.
Nicely done
Keep writing, reading and commenting.
Gaylene
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Hi! This was a very nice write by you. Be careful with beginning each line with caps... Other than that.. I give you two thumbs up!!
Melanie
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