tap--
tap--
tap--
An asynchronous cadence legato,
smooth and even myriad of tones,
whistling, fissure fraught, loudly
the storm begroans, windows speak
ancient languages of whom
the origin are all but known.
Crack--
snap--
Marcato, a silhouette the thunder constant
in its chase, to catch the foremost
lightning, it will never win the race;
the storm is all but here.
Boom-
Scathing stacato, rapid beat rhapsody
the storms trek is done, upon us comes the rolling
thunder, rains torrents and lightnings tumult.
Author notes
Deindichter
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 10 of 10
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I always enjoy your work, Deindichter.
This are outstanding descriptions of a torrential storm, giving me a feeling of being in the front row at a symphony.
I've learned a lot from you in the short time I've been writing. I hope to keep learning in the future.
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How great that you are able to hear the music in nature. A thunder storm could produce an opera then.
I believe myself that if we listened and looked close nature would reveal itself the supreme art creator
and we wouldn't need to do art at all for in fact it would show that it does excel all our human efforts.
Bon , till next time!
Cake -
kove the format and the repetition of the taps It rounded the sound well. you have set the scene before I even read the rest. i like it
"An asynchronous cadence legato,
smooth and even myriad of tones,
whistling, fissure fraught, loudly "
Love the musical illustration. tones lagato sets the pace.
also love the F alliteration. very feirce and frantic with the taps.
"a silhouette the thunder constant
in its chase, to catch the foremost
lightning, it will never win the race;
the storm is all but here."
This is my favorite part I have never thought of the thunder being described like this the personification is wonderful. An anonymous silhouette. and i loive the enjamberment where you have rooled all imagery here in to the next line. like it is so fast in the race that it is blurred in to the other lines.
Scathing stacato, rapid beat rhapsody
I love this line the alliteration causes a fanfare of words at the end.
well done I loved it. A great piece from an kind and honest AP member.
you have talent and my respect. well done:
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Different, yet still remarkable. I love how you can make any style your own and sound perfect
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If only I can make musical tones I shall give this melody. I am curious with the words you used. What does "legato" means?
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very cool! .. i like word choices here... shows a mastery of your topic.. and the way you blend it into a poem about nature is great.. flawless.
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Tbanks for your kind words, they are much appreciated.
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I liked this. It was different to your usual formatting style, tho not in your vocabuluary or type of thing you would write. Your nature poems seem to be your best. I thought this was a good poem tho felt there could have been more between "here" and "boom" as it felt anticlimactic. But other than that great write as usual.
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Very nice... listening to an orchestra's percussion through a storm in nature... well done. Thank you for your entry and best wishes in the contest.
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