When I see you
My knees get weak
When I hear your voice
My heart skips a beat
When I'm with you
I lose my breath
And I want you to know
You saved me from death
Author notes
not completely finished... if u hav ne ideas, feel free... haha. thanks!
A contest entry
- MY FIRST CONTEST: I WANT LOVE RIGHT NOW. PREWRITES ALLOWED...COME IN AND CHECK OUT by the-gifted.
600 points, ended September 26, 2007, 108 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 8 of 8
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this is almost like a love nursery rhyme
i really like the last 2 lines though 
best of luck in the contest. be well and be blessed
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wow! that is great! good luck in my contest
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This is good, a short, love poem with a nice feel to it. And then it gets serious in the end "You saved me from death". And I realize, how important it is. It creates another demention for the poem! Well done!
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Thank you for your kind words.
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Think even us oldies can relate back to feeling this way when love first came along, when we were smitten by someone. Very sensual - have see, hear, touch, now just need the other senses tomake it complete.
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Very beautiful and full of love that has been greatly expressed in such a short poem! Keep it up girl!
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oOo. I really like this poem. Keep up the great work!
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I know these feeling very well. I smiled when I read the first two lines. I recall these sentiments from my youth, and they still happen often after 34 years of marriage. LOL Excellent! Sounds finished to me, short and to the point!
Much LOVE Always ♥
Renee
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