The weakened weary wayfarer
crosses a sea of riles, rebirthed
each new raise recognized.
An allegorical arid path,
this traveler walks a contrived
pattern predetermined for him.
Learning, succinct symmetry singed
by a passionate God, flames forge
an identity, a zealous zenith.
Calamity cannot conceive impasse,
eager erudite seeks truth within
human harmony, a cogent understanding.
Author notes
I hope all enjoy!
A contest entry
- Quickie - Picture For Your Pens #5 by Ryno.
300 points, ended July 22, 2007, 14 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 5 of 5
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I like this almost self imposed journey in the inner soul and idea that discipline is required if one wants to arrive at some harmony with the self or understanding on oneself.
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Again with the alliterations. I think they add to the peice and make it more interesting to read, especially if you were to read it out loud.
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I really loved the idea, message and fact in the last and final line.. the alliteration was a little too much for the poem, but it also added to the poem, I am amazed at how you were able to use it so much but still stick to the topic...thanks for the enjoyable entry.
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A really creative and innovative take on the picture prompt, and some really wonderful word-play and poetic sound effects in this very well-crafted and thought-provoking piece. Best of luck in the contest!
David Michaels
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I didn't look at the pic but I like the poem regardless. I like the alliteration that you have in parts. Again, there's a couple words i'll need to look up to understand this better, but oh well--more expansion to the vocabulary. Good write.
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