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silent terror

Missing image


it came to me in many a dream
provoking terror in extreme
a frightening thought as you will see
in many a dream it came to me

into my mind this thought would creep
as I lay down to go to sleep
a fear of being so confined
this thought would creep into my mind

it’s dark and silent, cold and cruel
a festering torture for a fool
internal panic that is violent
cold and cruel it’s dark and silent


not exhumed and buried alive
there’s no way out, I can’t survive
she’s dead and gone, they all presumed
buried alive and not exhumed

it’s come to pass so now I’m here
I scratch the lid in violent fear
a wooden box locked with brass
so now I’m here, it’s come to pass

 

 

 

 

Author notes

Swap Quatrain:

Each stanza in the poem must be a quatrain (four lines) where the first line is reversed in the fourth line. In addition, line 2 must rhyme with line 1, and line 3 must rhyme with line 4 and so on, BUT not repeat the same rhyming pattern on subsequent stanzas.
Rhyming pattern: AABB, CCDD, and so on.
The Swap Quatrain was created by Lorraine M. Kanter.

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Comments

1 - 20 of 20

  • dragonfly89
    November 2

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    Beatiful...

    read, the rhyming was well executed and the poem flowed freely off the tongue. It was a quite enjoyable read. Thank you and good luck


    • Amera gold member
      November 2
      Edit | Reply
      I see your finalist list is all free verse poetry and unstructured form. Sorry I'm a formal poet, my poems are removed. Sorry to take up your time.


  • Mairi bheag gold member
    July 31, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    This form is trickier to navigate than it seems, and a poem can end up sounding contrived. This isn't the first swap quatrain I have read by you, and I continue to be impressed by the way that you handle the form. Well crafted!


    • Amera gold member
      July 31, 2007

      Edit | Reply
      I see you've read a few of these. I have a feeling we're going to see a Swap Quatrain by bheag soon.


  • Asylaarix
    July 26, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    WOWZERZ ... not only was this a fantastic write of fear ... but the form was amazing ... it was ... breath-taking ... very well done darling ... The fear of being burried alive ... yep I've had that thought a time or two ... but mostly when I see it on T.V. ... it's a horrible thought to encounter ... I'm claustrophic ... so that would kill me alone ... being locked in a box and barely able to move ... very well done darling ... Thank you for your entry and Good Luck ... Much Luv Kiss Sparkeh


  • Swan song gold member
    July 26, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    again good form and now you gave me the dam creeps!
    you could have saved this for Holloween you know.
    Excellent !!!


  • ellipsist
    July 25, 2007

    Edit | Reply

    I like this a lot...

    I read it kind of to the tune of "The Adam's Family"



    I love it when rhyming pieces can be kind of innocently musical and hauntingly chanted...


  • Desire gold member
    July 25, 2007

    Edit | Reply

    Holy Momma!!

    I swear I stalk Your page and then after I log out...the piece manifests
    You magic
    What a verse penned with Powerful images~
    Oy!

    I Love the form You chose for this and I had to read again...the story itself grabs the reader;
    can't help but feel this one~

    Loved it!!

    Best wishes to You in the contest
    Many blessings too
    and much love~ Desire~*~


  • Whoochi gold member
    July 24, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    Gripping, chilling, sounds too much like my night terrors I suffer from...excellent form once again...ewww....good luck...Dam, you do dark & creepy well too....


  • DK akaLunaticSerene gold member
    July 22, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    Wow! Great minds fear alike! Cool form, it made for seamless flow as can always be counted on in any amerapome! This is haunting and beautiful!
    xxoo
    dk

  • Swan song gold member
    July 22, 2007
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    Well this makes you the darkness queen and only you can pull of such form in an outstanding way. You are just too good girl.


  • RedAquarius
    July 21, 2007

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    This looks like a fun form. Besides that, I like the creepiness of this, the fast rhythm is a great benefit for creepy, makes it have that fast, nightmare, someone's chasing me feel!


  • HaleyMary
    July 20, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    Interesting write. Great rhythm. This piece made me think of how horrible it would be to be buried alive. I liked the pic in this piece. It seemed creepy like something out of "The Sixth Sense" or one of those horror films. Good luck in the contest.


  • Whispering Wind Moderators member
    July 20, 2007

    Edit | Reply

    WOW!

    Found myself holding my breath hoping the death was not real but in the box buried alive locked with brass she dare not survive...Gripping fear! This is one powerful piece you have written...now can I have my breath back please before I end up in that box


  • PerVirtuous
    July 20, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    This is very cute. The form is perfect. The flow is good. The idea of being buried alive is a powerful feeling of helplessness. The ultimate helplessness. You have captured it very well.

    Three bunnies!


  • PoetsAngel
    July 20, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    ooo chilling, gave me goose bumps, brilliant and scary....another golden poem me thinks

    Cathy
    x♥x♥


  • PrabhuDayal Khattar silver member
    July 19, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    A wooden box locked with brass
    so now I’m here, it’s come to pass

    Well Amera you are an expert of the words and emotions to bring forth the beauty of poetic land marks..I love ait

    a great and effective write is here...





  • StarEyes
    July 19, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    OK, MISS FORM QUEEN........

    This is amazing!!! I love it!!! What a great read this one is! I have noooooo idea how you can do all these different forms! But you are fantastic at them! This is amazing!! Best of luck in this contest!

    and much love

    Nyetta


  • Bedroom Eyes
    July 19, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    Wow...this is really interesting...in an eerie way. The graphic is enough to give me the chills

    I admit that I'm net well versed in very many form poems, but you do them so very well

    I might have to try to pry some info out of you one of these days

    Splendid piece you've done here

    All the best in the contest!

1 - 20 of 20