The heart marches with hope steadfast
Joyous mourners shout, not I
Wicked thoughts strewn like leaves
Of a future full and empty
Soft breathing , absent sonorous din
Still there, still there
Yet he is gone home
Our parting expectant, rife, triumphant!
A contest entry
- Eloquence in Brevity by RatherImaginative.
1400 points, ended July 31, 2007, 29 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
-
"triumphanr!" This looks like it might be a typo. "sonous" Sonorous, perhaps?
There are so many intriguing contradictions within the poem (a future full and empty, joyous mourners). They deepen the message of your poem wonderfully. The speaker's own feelings are contradictory about the loss or departure of him. This one really made me think. Thanks so much for entering my contest!
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