Mother, can You hear me ? This child here is suffering,
seeking Your ear while she’s speaking her prayer :
Watching how the humans destroy Mother Earth
through their greed and their ignorance, fills me with grief.
Science and technology used without love,
will pollute and empoison this planet we share.
Mother, I am begging You, please stop their greediness,
fill up their neediness, please bring relief.
When I look within me, I feel how the Earth must feel,
sharing her helplessness and her despair.
Hearing how her heart beats in my very heart,
makes me wonder if healing our Earth we’ll achieve.
I am Planet Earth, and my lungs are the rainforest,
watching it suffocate fills me with pain.
Birds are taking refuge within soothing shade,
yet my leaves wear the coat of pollution and death.
I can no more breathe all those fumes of the factories,
cars blow their breath into my burning nose.
Mother, won’t You speak to their hearts locked with pride
and with arrogance, lest they are turning insane ?!
Won’t they understand that the toxins and smoke
shall return to them manifold through every breath ?
Can’t they see the outcome of lack of compassion
with Earth who’s their mother, who’s holding them close ?
Mother, I am desperate, please save our Earth;
she’s our mother, our nourisher, please stop this crime !
Quench our thirst with love from the fountain of innocence,
Fill us with wisdom – as long as it’s time …
***
Author notes
OPTION 5 : the monologue of earth
***
in loving dedication to my spiritual mother AMMA
http://www.amma.org/amma/index.html
***
this prayer is based on a vision I have experienced a few days ago,
on 07 17 07 (at 11:11 GMT) during a worldwide meditation … I was sitting in the center of my garden-aviary, and felt myself being the Earth, and my lungs were the rainforest … my little bird was sitting on top of my head, and suddenly, several wild birds gathered on the roof and on the outer perches … 3 of them were the chickadees I had the honor and joy to rescu from a metal tube in the forest, when they were a few days old … I had nourished them and watched them how they learned how to fly in my living-room; and after a few weeks, I set them free … they are doing well and stop by regularly to pick some nuts … I am a bit concerned about them eating insects in the neighbouring gardens, for some of the neighbours are using insecticides, chemical fertilizers and herbicides …
***
as for the meter of this poem, it is based on a Sanskrit sloka (devotional hymn), whose rhythm I consider very appropriate for this sort of incantation … it's called the "mahishasura mardhini stotram" and is a hindu invocation to the Divine Mother in the form of Goddess Durga, the Demon-Slayer ... here's the link for those who wish to listen to the rhythm (meter) and enchanting melody of this chant :
http://www.musicindiaonline.com/p/x/dqf93jzz6S.As1NMvHdW/
***
each line of my poem is divided into two lines, because of the length of each line, and the meter goes like this :
/X/X/XX/XX/XX/XX/XX/XX/
(X being the unstressed, / the stressed syllables)
the rhyme-scheme is as follows :
ab ab ab cde cde ff
***
In a list
A contest entry
- Rhyme and Meter Workshop - Incantations by Epistomolus.
875 points, ended July 21, 2007, 9 entries
Gold trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 21 of 21
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Bravo!
" Quench our thirst with love from the fountain of innocence,"
"Fill us with wisdom – as long as it’s time …"
You searched for the truth by observing and feeling the world as it is. Most people could not search for a speck of honesty because it would be too painful and rather shocking. They have shut the world, our planet, out of their mind and pretend that what they see does not exist. They see and hear only a silent hum of daily urban life.
What a shame because if we do not look outside our windows soon, our earth will be nonexistant.
Bravo!
Betsy Holzner
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Hi, lovely poem, but I fear the gods are sick to death of mortals, they mess it up every time, I hope your prayer works, hugs Di,
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Three cheers!
Congratulations Marion, for your gold trophy - this poem touched a lot of hearts, may it reach many more! -
I appreciate your description of the form, because it's subtle enough for me to either miss it or have to spend a great deal of time trying to figure it out. What works well is that the lines are long and the rhymes so far apart that they softly echo rather than chime. I also enjoy the internal rhymes, assonance, and repetition.
The meter fits well with the overall tone of your invocation. This is a very successful and heartfelt poem, where the words, rhythm, and meaning form a gestalt.
I did find it a little confusing because you are addressing the poem to the divine mother, you say that "I am planet Earth," and then say "please save our Earth;/she's our mother." While you may hold these beliefs yourself, and they can exist quite comfortably together in your own mind, be certain that you're sending the message that you want your readers to receive. If you want the reader to have to sort things out and ponder what you've said, then it's appropriate. If you want to send a clear message that flows into the reader's consciousness unimpeded, your imagery needs to be coherent throughout, or you have to gently lead us through the transformation from one image to the next.
But those are relatively minor obvservations as I look over the depth and breadth of your very successful poem. Thank you for sharing this with us. -
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thank you so much for the gold trophy ... which I humbly offer at divine mother's feet ...
your in-depth comment is most appreciated, and I agree that the message is not a hundred percent clear ...
in my meditation I felt one with mother earth ... yet, not all the time ... so one moment I will speak from a dimension of unity, and the next one, of separation ...
I also haven't added that my own lungs are suffering from a disease and that feeling my lungs being the rainforest has somehow been a revelation to me that we are not separated from earth, and that each one of our organs corresponds to her "organs" of nature ... this offered me some understanding of my own illness as well ...
in a way, I was also saying "please save me ..."
I always imagine that others can read my mind
- or, on the other hand, have the tendency to "explain" too much ...
I guess I will have to learn how to find a balance ...
merci beaucoup for your precious guidance and feedback !
maa
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How very beautiful this cry from the depths of a spirit, I hope that those who read will hear and learn and we will use our energy to the good. What a wonderful tale you added to tell of the inspiration given you and your surroundings at the time, I could picture all that you described and it felt so full and blessed.
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This is the current focus - the mother
Thank you maa and all my love. There is the possible cleansing by human care and affection.. Zipporah -
This is incredible!
I love it! You've done a fantastic job here, and your additional information was not only educational, but it will hopefully open some eyes. Your background and picture are splendid, and fit well with the worldwide theme of this poem. This is a great piece, and I'm bookmarking it to read over and over again.
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Thanks so much for lending your very eloquent poetic voice to the celestial choir of the human spirit. This is truly a beautiful heart-felt hymn and prayer and was very moving.
David Michaels
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Beautiful and true
Dear one, you are right, the earth needs a voice, someone to convince us to take care of her and each other. "Science and technology used without love," information and money used without love, these are killing us and the planet. You are so right, thank you for this lovely work.
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In reading other's reactions and your words in return to them...I found relevance again. Yes, time is of little consequence. Only actions and cycles of lessons learned and yet to be mastered are of importance. Your connections to harmony and the lights within souls made it possible for you to become as one with mother earth during the meditation. I felt you and several others during my hour, and like you felt it wasn't enough time. Your words are powerful and the chanting rhyme lends more strength and light to the message it holds.
Blessings always, Blue
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What we do everyday to our planet is awful!! I so agree with your write. So full of wonderful imagery and emotions. What a wonderful prayer
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thank you so much, my dear and faithful friend ... I'm in a wondersome mood today ...
much love to you,
marion
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Ooooo Sis I heard the Mahishasura Mardhini Sthotram, it's beautiful. Is that your voice?
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no, not my voice ...
my favorite version is sung by Amma herself, but it's not on internet, as far as I know ... I have it on cd and dvd, it's amazing ...
while searching for amma's version, I found a little video in the archives where Amma sings in English ... when I heard her voice and saw her wiping her tears, I knew that this was Her answer to my prayer-poem here ... even if it was sung "before" I had written it (but does time matter in the realms of the timeless heart ?)
here are Her words :
"Everyone in the world should sleep without fear,
at least for one night, sleep without fear.
Everyone in the world should eat to their fill,
at least for one day, eat to their fill.
There should be one day when there is no violence,
no one is injured, no one is harmed.
All people young and old should serve the poor
and needy, at least for one day, serve selflessly.
This is my dream.
This is my prayer.
Love is the answer, love is the way.
Love is the answer, love is the way."
- Amma -
here is the video :
http://videos.amritapuri.org/2007/07everyone.php
marion
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Heart speaks
Your heart speaks, cries here loud and clear. Pollution/polluted, evil, dishonest, cunning and selfish people are all in this world far and wide, enjoying to their hearts' content. This is world. We can not help it. This is all about cause and effect. The evil force is gathering and bursting into enjoyment only to destroy itself. We do not have to worry. But we will have to play our part ethically. That is all we can do and we need to do. May Mother bless you!
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I have just watched again a video of a little girl who came to see Amma and who wanted "to make peace for the world" ... I rarely saw a more touching scene :
http://videos.amritapuri.org/2006/06amritavarshini.php
marion
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my dearest brother,
thank you so much for your response ...
your words are soothing for this aching heart ...
as long as there are souls like you around, all is well ...
much love to you and your dear ones,
marion
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Oh Sis! This is beautiful! Thank you so much for writing it. I know, I'm a pest but you made me happy. This is bitter sweet but it is a prayer that I know will be heard. I found myself singing it half way through so I started it again and sang it. This is so lovely and I pray that thousands of people see it.
Love,
Amera ♥
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Even if it ends, please write it anyway. The title perked my interest.
Love,
Amera ♥ -
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thank you so much, sweetie, I have just finished the poem, it's quite lengthy, but I love it ! going to type it now ...
I'm so touched by your encouragement ...
marion
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