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Mystery's Mirror Rhyme

<---> Mirror's muse reflects
as mirror recollects
on mirror which reflects
upon mirror which reflects
upon mystery of light.

 
Mirror thus protects

mirror which projects

reflection which reflects

on mirror which expects

historical insight. 

 

Mirror interjects

texts, textures and contexts

which chance elects, selects

then checks and double checks

for infinite delight.

 

Mirror's light directs

life's mysteries, neglects

naught it interconnects

as cause links to effects

exciting to invite.

 

Mirror then detects

when mirror role reflects
mirror which deflects
mirror which rejects
history of night

 

Mirror thus connects,

collects and self respects,

perpetually perfects

externals it bedecks

with inner meanings' might.<--->

Author notes

Form ... after Swinburne
robi3_0352_robi3_0000 XXX_EMX

Any verse may be read in any order ... Enjoy !

Background Sundog Reflection Mark Kilner
http://flickr.com/photos/markkilner/2298077513/



Cat pic : http://flickr.com/photos/pyxopotamus/2355649275/


Kaleidoscope 2 http://flickr.com/photos/crystalwriter/2393815171/

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Comments

1 - 21 of 21

  • SummerlandRayne gold member
    June 23

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    ahhh...very clever and imaginative...thanks for the entry...love the background and pics...


  • Salty Hibiscus gold member
    June 5
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    adorable cat! thankks for sharing.


  • white stone
    May 22

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    That is awesome, Jon. Spinning wildly here, very deep and effective. I found the font and picture at the top to be non sequitur though, I think this piece deserves better and more serious presentation. Just my opinion.


  • Mr-D
    May 21

    Edit | Reply
    Interesting form, started well but then it seemed to become difficult to project the images you needed and you have to break from the rigidity a bit. I think be careful with things like "as cause links to effects" as while it sounds good its structural sense can be slightly off and unpolished. Something like "as cause links to effect" or "as causes link to effects" make things grammatically easier to progress in your mind. But I understand the consideration of form is constraining.

    While this stanza is clever:
    Mirror interjects
    texts, textures and contexts
    which chance elects, selects
    then checks and double checks
    for infinite delight.

    It does force a change in intonement, which may impede the natural breathed flow. Unless this is intended in the imagery I would be careful with being too tricky

    You obviously have good capability but sometimes being too tricky with your words does your communication a disservice.


  • Leth gold member
    May 20

    Edit | Reply

    Wow o.o

    This is an interesting and compelling write unlike any other I have seen so far. Very, very 'out there' when compared to the standard cookie cutter 'aabb' or 'abab' stuff that most people write.

    First off, major kudos on your use of rhyme. Well played. It takes talent to pull of natural rhymes, especially the way you do.

    The whole thing flows extremely well. Even when read in any order of your choosing (which, after reading your author's notes, I tried and found works perfectly). That's something highly inspiring.

    Amazing write. I wouldn't change a single thing. Amazing form and subject matter. 5/5


  • EmptyFrame
    May 19

    Edit | Reply

    Excellent.

    This poem was obviously written by a well seasoned poet. It rhymes (alot) without ever sounding too much like a dr. sues story, which is hard with as many rhyming lines as this poem has. Also, the poem has a nice rhythm to it, which gives a sense of drive and encourages the reader to anticipate the next line.

    Also, the analysis and interpretation of the mirror in this poem is very clever. I felt as if it was being used as a metaphor to explain people's perspectives of various situations - the reflection is different from everyone's standpoint.

    Thanks for the read!

    ~xan


  • Ignis Corpus
    February 12

    Edit | Reply
    OH MY! I liked this one so much I actually read it aloud once to myself, then I read it aloud again to my sister THEN again to my family. This is so beautiful. I loved how it was laid out. I loved the flow it. How complex it seems but yet it's always so simple and logical. I wish you the very best of luck in this contest.

    Ignis Corpus


  • Mantha
    January 27
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    this is brilliant
    need i say more


  • delayedscreening
    August 23, 2008
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    welcome to the playground.

    like a alliterative version of free association. thought it was fun.


  • 2lullabyhaven
    August 23, 2008

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    Wow, quite impressive; thanks for your entry and good luck in my contest

  • Ace - LightWithinMe
    August 13, 2008

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    Hello.

    Your play on words is great, and there are many meanings in what you are saying. I very much doubt I have ascertained all of them.

    My own interpretation is that the basic foundation of the mirror only comes into being when light is present, but also the angle of the light coming in dictates the angle of the light reflected. This leads to perception being defined by stance and how one sees what is happening. This then leads to the propogation of that particular perception.

    The more mirrors you have the more the light is reflected through many different angles and again propogation. However as it is based on light, there is as you put it a complete rejection of "history of the night", nothing done in the dark is noted and thus not passed on. But as we are often mirrors for each others behaviour, and showing each other oneself, one has to ask, what is the original source; if I was to link it to your other poem I read, it would be I AM, and we are all mirrors reflected the one light from countless angles, to countless angles.

    A smart poem, well written with a sense of lyrical panache. I wish you well in the contest.

    My regards.


  • owlish
    July 30, 2008

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    Wow. I love the rhyme, totally perfect. It might not make sense all the time, but what the heck, the title is Mystery' Mirror Rhyme, it rhyme, its about mirrors, and it's mysterious! Lol, great job, best of luck with the contest.


  • Rebekah-Ann silver member
    July 30, 2008

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    I love the poem and the cat picture. I think this poem is such an honest TWIST of that what we can see in the mirrior. As the light goes through and twist the reflection is sometimes not something we expected.

    ***Please add the form type of your poem to your author notes ***

    Thank you for your lovely entry and all the best in the contest!

    Rebekah


  • SignifyingNothing
    July 7, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    I don't really understand what much of this means, but I like it anyway. This poem just does such neat things with words. I love the rhythm and rhyme, I don't even care that I can't figure out what it means! Reminds me a little of the Bells by Edgar Allan Poe. Only critique- I wouldn't repeat "mirror which reflects" in the first stanza.

    Reading it again, it kind of makes me think of how a mirror reflets into infinity if you are standing in one of those mirrors in clothing store changing rooms. The way they go on forever. Cool...is that what you were thinking of? Because if it was, you did it great!

    Pretty cool poem, and unique, too.


  • Darianna
    May 12, 2008

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    This makes me feel so dizzy and disorientated! I don't know if I'm looking at a reflection or whether I'm looking at a reflections reflection or whether it's a reflection looking at me...or which way is up. Lol! I enjoyed the thoughts behind this poem and what it represents. For me personally, although the whole concept is amazing, it begins to grate on me a bit with the constant repetition. maybe that's just me not wanting to endlessly look into reflections and face them for myself. I don't know. The more I read the more I found it difficult to comprehend anymore. Very clever stuff though!

    Thank you for taking part in my contest!

    Dari xxx


  • Lily of the Valley
    April 28, 2008

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    This reminded me of being in a crazy hall of mirrors where you can see yourself from all angles, in varying shapes and sizes, which is possible a reflection of our inner selves and we change our personality and appearance over time. The idea and the vision dizzy the mind but this poem certainly inspires the mind to think beyond what the eye can see


  • maa gold member
    April 28, 2008

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    the eye that cannot see itself

    your poem reminds me of an eye trying to look at itself ... until it realizes the relativity of its "eye-ness/I-ness" ...


  • Heavens Child
    August 15, 2007

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    Quite the tongue twister.... a marvelous job. I absolutely love the second half. Very well done.
    Thank you for the entry in my contest.


  • Star Shine
    August 8, 2007

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    Please list which AP poet and which poem you used as your inspiration. This has a twist in the depth you are portraying (pun intended.) Worth a re-read and some contemplation. Good use of the verb choices.


    • Jonathan ROBIN
      August 8, 2007
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      Reflections

      Inspiration came from personal reflections (pun intended) and not from any AP poet lol ... especially as written in November 1990

      • maa gold member
        April 28, 2008
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        past and future entwine ... admit that you have thought of ma_ma rions when writing this mysterious mirror poem !

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