In memorial,
marbled epitaphs
cannot hide
the souls within,
the memories
forever scored
upon eternity.
I see
what time will
yet forget
the wisdom,
the beauty,
that once gave life
where only
hollow, empty,
remains are kept.
Entombed,
but soul set
free
from mortalities
prison.
Author notes
I was inspired by the prompt transparent graves
A contest entry
- Closes at 15 entries, Be Inspired By These Set of Words... by Tangled Angle.
420 points, ended July 20, 2007, 12 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
-
i loved this. it was amazing and effective.
the words were strong and provoking keeping the readers concentration locked to the poem.
this was an amazing write as always
well done
-
66
I like this, a bit simple (too??) simple and the line breaking was ineffective, and made the flow be a bit off. I thought you could have gotten more creative, developed this more, and give this more depth. Besides that, good job.
originality: 10
creativity: 6
use of devices: 6
title: 9
development: 4
rhyme/line breaks: 5
length: 6
flow: 6
impact: 7
enjoyment: 7
total: 66
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