moments i'm so close to you my body aches
my heart is yours now to bend or break
every part of me yours to take
forever my being will belong to you
do what you will, do what you do
make me tingle and i'll touch you too
my soul is hungry for your desire
no one's caress could take me higher
your body glistens when you take me
under your spell and I want you more
I want to feel the fire in my core
I want you farther, deeper in me
as your warm beauty I explore
with fingernails your skin i'll rake
when this ecstacy becomes too much
this is pleasure I almost can't take
where did you learn to love like that?
your passion is a feeling you can't fake
you unleash heat in me no one else can make
consume my every thought and urge, and then
take me under to drown in ecstasy again.
Author notes
*grins*
A contest entry
- Intimacy by princess-bubblegum.
300 points, ended September 9, 2007, 13 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Step into my shoes by Tefnut.
460 points, ended October 10, 2007, 13 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
-
woah
This was very very well written
I blushed toward the ending
the only problem is..well it doesn't really fit the innocence that I was looking for
-
Very well written! I like the idea here, explaining how you feel about a certain journey, without actually describing it as it happens! I like it! However, I do think you could do more with the rhyme scheme, its good, but has plenty more potential, and your punctuation could use a bit of encouragement!
Overall, a great poem!
Well done and good luck!
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