You’re a vision! I don't need two eyes to tell me that, no I don't.
So if I close them, I'd have to seal them shut, so I won't.
Now I can't blink or even think, I'll freeze your image in my mind.
It's the way that you look,
The way that you touch,
It's the sound of your voice,
That I love so much.
It's the smell of your perfume,
The taste of your lips,
Oh baby don’t leave me,
Don’t leave me like this.
As you talk, you like to smile at me and, lean in close.
And as you do, I get to breathe the scent of a, morning rose.
You hold my hand, you understand, I'll love you till the end of time.
Cause' it's the way that you look,
The way that you touch,
It's the sound of your voice,
That I love so much.
It's the smell of your perfume,
The taste of your lips,
Oh baby don’t leave me,
So empty like this.
I was rash and I was cold, but it's worse now I’m alone.
Bring your smile back to me; we can make it now you'll see.
Oh your scent it lingers on, even stronger now your gone.
Didn't get to say goodbye, I'm convinced you didn't die!
It's the way that you look,
The way that you touch,
It’s the sound of your voice,
That I love so much.
It’s the smell of your perfume,
The taste of your lips,
Oh baby don’t leave me,
Don’t leave me like this.
It was the way that you looked,
The way that you touched,
And the sound of your voice,
That I loved so much.
It was the smell of your perfume,
The taste of your lips,
Oh baby you left me,
Without a last kiss.
© copyrighted property of T.J.S
Author notes
Shadedgrey- Ive had this song in my head for a couple of years and I never shared it with anyone. I think its quite poetic and im sorta proud of it so I'd love to know what you think as I'm working on the music.
A contest entry
- Romance & Men by JesusFreak92.
550 points, ended December 12, 2008, 17 entries
Silver trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Make up your own song lyrics by DeathlyAngel.
550 points, ended January 7, 19 entries
Honorable mention
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Why do you love? by wondering.willow.
407 points, ended February 6, 15 entries
Silver trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Comments
1 - 21 of 21
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This is a ver beatiful poem/song. I think it flows very nicley and the chopice of words really do make one think. I d like to thank you for this entre, and applogize for commenting being to late, good luck in the contest and keep writting.
Thank you,
Chelsey. -
wonderful. thats pretty much the first word that comes to my head, that and freegen amazing! i was totally drawn to this write. i loved it! thank you for entering.
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this is beautiful!
the words flow into a masterpiece
great job !
<3 abbey -
Fantastic write! Truly wonderful, this is sure to make a brilliant song - I bet I will be hearing it on the radio sooner or later! Very well-written and full of sweet emotion. Well done. Thanks for entering the contest
peace x -
Hey
First id like to say
this is a beautiful poem.
I really liked it.
I held this contest becasue my aunt just died not that long ago.
and i wanted to see what other people
thought and felt about ther loved ones who passed
and there love ones who are dying.
Such an amazing poem.
i really like your writing
Thanks so much for entering my contest
i hope to see some of your other poems in my upcoming contest~
~~~christina -
reads like a verse to a song. Not badly written tho. Thanks for joining the contest. Good luck
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Fantastic.
Very sad and moving.
I love the way it is written in song.
Well done and thank you for entering my contest.
Good luck to you, Dani. -
I love this! They're so.. perfect
I'd be proud too if I wrote this. When you're done with the music, post it on youtube or something with a link on your page. I'd listen to it
Well done,
Chin up,
Swim.x
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Awww this is really good...definitely sounds like a song! Great job, good luck!
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soul song
this sings a true love song which i will hear thought the day
thanks for you entry
Robert
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Beutiful...
excellent write, i love musical writing, though you'd know better; i think lowwwww bass or soft drumming music. i really enjoyed this and like you already - Gd.Lk. - Domz
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I'd love to hear this as a song. It has a really definable rhythm, and I love the last two lines. There are a few typos/spelling mistakes throughout, but otherwise, good write and good luck in the contest!
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i love it. it sounds like an awesome song. its so sad and open and true. great job and good luck in the contest
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This was a beautiful poem full of emotion, love, and thoughts. i really enjoyed the flow and your style of poetry. Thanks for sharing & best of luck
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Love the repatition of the stanza witht a few minor tweaks. Each stanza builds off of eachother very nicely. I adore the last stanza, it ended it veyr well.
It was the way that you looked,
The way that you touched,
And the sound of your voice,
That I loved so much.
It was the smell of your perfume,
The taste of your lips,
Oh baby you left me,
Without a last kiss.
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Very good and the repeat of the lines was a good choice, it really sets the scene
Thank you for sharing & entering!
x -
pretty long to read but very well written. full of a lot of strong emotion. best of luck in the contest. be well and be blessed
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OMG this was deep. I thought for sure it was going to end differently, I actually heard music playing to this. Wonderful yet sad piece. Best of luck to you in this contest.
Tory -
a really long piece but a piece that was well worth reading...this is a beautiful piece and the emotion show in it was amzazing...the flow is perfect in every aspect and the love and the imagery is brillant...
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truly awesome
Beautiful words with deep feeling. The chorus is just outstanding and even gave me goose bumps..lol. It is really that good. The flow is simply superb. To feel so strongly about someone is heartwarming. I could certainly see well, hear this playing on the radio...do something with it...or maybe you are or have Music to me is a must have, it soothes the soul, can pick us up when we're at our lowest or just make us relax and daydream awhile, the same as writing does. Beautiful!! No doubt, be very very proud. Two thumbs up..
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wow
I'm speechless. its Great.... I really love the way you write.
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