Tag, your it!
the children giggle, circling your brain.
--you open your eyes; they are running and playing
around you on the beach.
--you lay quiet, and quite comfortable
upon your damp, sandy bed:
evening tide won't come in for hours
as small waves cool your feet,
sinking them slowly into the shore:
Immersion.
Tropical banana trees exfoliate
with the smell of fresh fruit.
--and you are young
--and the day is young, too:
--and both are ripe.
Taking a deep breath of sea-salty air,
you exhale.
--no one is expecting you
--no one is wondering where you are:
--you don't even know.
Washed ashore, you are free
having escaped: reality.
A contest entry
- Creativity Please by deleteit.
1800 points, ended July 19, 2007, 14 entries
Honorable mention
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
did you get lost?
Comments
1 - 6 of 6
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...I updated this poem on 9/05/07
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You did a fantastic job at awakening the senses and bringing the mind to such a serene place. This definitely took my mind away. Thank you for entering and best of luck in the contest
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this was awsome and had strong imagery in it. so you could imagine the whole scene. i loved it. a wonderful write. best of luck in the contest
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i love it especially the last line!!! thanks for showing me this it was amazing
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Wow! i loved this! I pictured it so well.
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Thank you for taking the time to read my poem. I tried to appeal to all five senses. It was my first attenpt at this tpye of poetry, though. I shall get better.
-Blessings,
--Pap.
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