Why would you
hurt me so?
Do you find pleasure
in causing others pain?
My tears could
have flooded the lake...
I sat on the planked dock,
with my birthday balloons
all for you.
I had my invitation.
You knew the boat left
an hour before I would arrive.
You knew I would be here
left behind.
And I still wish you a
Happy Birthday,
because my heart
beats differently
than yours.
A contest entry
- x♥WithOut♥x (Picture Inspiration) by Sle3p.
380 points, ended July 16, 2007, 13 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 16 of 16
-
Excellent
Very well done. You touched so wonderfully with your words -
I love it! the picture works well too
-
Betsy wonderful picture great poem as always
I am going to write soon
that is when I am the strongest and unstopubl sterling
-
-
Thanks sterling !
-
-
Great interpretation of the picture, an excellant write. So sad. Well done Betsy! Best of luck in your contest. Hugs, Kelly
-
Great
i realy like this!! Shelby says she can't compeat? I think this is the hardest contest ever for me to judge. Great job.
-maddie
-
-
i dont think i can
but good luck momma
and mad good luck judging :]
♥--Starry -
-
Shelby - you are a great writer from what I've seen so far --- don't doubt yourself!! And that's an ORDER!!
mama b
-
-
Aye Aye Captain :]
♥--Starry
-
-
-
shelby's silly - she CAN compete!
Have fun judging!! glad it's you and not me! 
Betsy
-
-
Wonderful
Very well done. Just really tugs at the heart. Best of luck in the contest.
-
-
lol - it was quick, but I tried to get the point across Thanks for the reassuring comment! Betsy
-
-
i believe i have a love hate relationship wit this.
it's a really good poem.
and i really like it alot.
but, (isn't that a lovey word? lol)
i think it seems very common now adays.
i think you could have put more detail or imagery into it.
either way,
this is a GREAT poem and i wish you the best of luck in your contest. :] -
-
I was going for that simple, plain easy thing in this write. I thought that too many details or feelings would upset the real picture. Thanks for the wonderful comments -- I like that you really took the time to read and see Betsy
-
-
ergg
I cant compeat against this !!
haha its way too good!!
ilyy
♥--Starry
-
-
YES YOU CAN!!! Silly girl!
-
Adding your comment:
1 - 16 of 16
