summer rain is coming soon
i walk outside each morning
with the sole purpose of
LOOKING
^
^
UP
evaporate from this state
leave all this dust behind
carry through the atmosphere
let regrets become moisture
leave them for a thirsty desert
observe the growth which comes from
LETTING GO
tell me
Comments
1 - 6 of 6
-
amazing
Hmm great right O... one of the best i like it a lot. its form is lovely and the thoughts behind it... isn't it nice to let our regrets become moisture?
it rained yesterday.. i figured it would be a great day for you. lata
Kami
-
very serene write
its almost as if you bring your reader on a trip around the atmosphere with this write. i can feel my thoughts changing from bad to good with this piece. thank you for allowing me to read such a beautiful and heartfelt write. you have lifted my spirits today... -
I enjoyed it but the line 'evaporate from this sate' did you mean this or was is 'state' that you intended, for as it is I found it a little awkward and disturbed the flow of an otherwise very good write.
-
-
ah! thanks
wow i didnt catch that haha yeah "sate" is pretty disturbing haha thanks again
-
-
mmmmmm sweet
i like this i love the whole looking up and letting go thing, i like the way it looks and the page,
this is a wonderful opening:
summer rain is coming soon
i walk outside each morning
with the sole purpose of
LOOKING
thanks for the chance to read such a class poem
-
Jackin
visual art at it's finest
to be so ... and more
I want to - let go
Adding your comment:
1 - 6 of 6
