my mother believes in jesus
not like an archaeologist
or anthropologist
or historian
nor even a biblical scholar
or theologian
she ignores evidence
lets waste
"god given" reason
because it is not religion
or knowledge
she seeks
but an entire other life
full of magic
and imagined wonder
a place where someone will listen
when she speaks
where she is loved
and forgiven
and i'm glad
my mother has found it
although she is lost to me now
her eyes offer
only the pity
allotted to the dammed
some day
she may perform
her first miracle
believing herself in heaven
while each of her children burn



















49 old applause
